Being a Banner [ 1 of JA ]

59

It felt great taking a shower. My hair gets super greasy easily, so scrubbing shampoo and running conditioner in my hair felt like paradise. The soap Pepper had put in the bathroom was vanilla scented, which was something I didn't have for a while; I had to use unscented because it was cheaper at my local store. I had this habit of pulling too many loose strands of hair from rinsing the conditioner out of my hair.
      My hair was getting heavier and longer. I'm pretty sure my hair grows unnaturally long from my powers, like what happens to Dad. Perhaps the gamma radiation does something to my follicles. If this meant it happened on my legs as well then I'm screwed.
      I laugh at myself, knowing that'd make Dalia laugh. She would've made a joke out of it too, and it would've been even funnier.
You shouldn't have ran. If you stayed with her she wouldn't have died.
      But Hulk was in trouble, what happens to him must happen to Dad. I thought I was saving everyone.
That's right, you thought.
      A lump forms fast in my throat and an awkward sob escapes my lips. My eyes become glossy, and I can't tell if tears or water fall from my face.
      Knocking at the bathroom door catches me off guard.
      "Kerry?" Dad says. "Are you okay?"
      I sniff and clear my throat, "Yeah, I'm. . .fine." I don't know if Dad left, but I could sense the feeling that he lingered just for a second.
      Once I finished washing and rinsing, I got out of the shower. I brushed my teeth and combed my hair. I got clothes on from the bag, and stole one of Howie's hoodie once again. I dried my hair with the towel and brushed my hair again, then pulled it into a pony tail. After that I lay in bed, facing away from the bedroom door. My eyes hang heavy, tired and weak. I close my eyes, hoping to fall asleep.
      Instead, I dream of Dalia in our apartment on the couch, and sitting next to her is Dad. I could hear myself laughing with the two of them over something, but it didn't matter. She was smiling anyways. I open my eyes and sit up, sweating like a pig.
      I dangle my legs off the side of the bed, facing the door. Groaning, I rub my eyes and sigh deeply. Someone knocks at my door.
      "Kerry?" Dad asks on the other side. "Can I come in?"
      "Yeah," I reply. The door opens and Dad enters.
      "Are you okay?" He asks gently, almost like a whisper.
      "I'm fine." I say. Dad closes his eyes and sighs. He turns and closes the door. His brown eyes look down on me as he wears a frown.
      "When are you gonna stop lying to me?" He asks.
      "I'm not. . .wait what?" The tiredness was getting to me as I run my eyes once more.
      "I'm your dad, I know when things aren't right." He lightly chuckles, but his frown reappears. "I thought about what you said, about me leaving. Tony also told me the little chat he had with you." Dad's eyes look red, like he was getting teary. "You could've told me you were lonely, that I needed to be there. You could've caught me getting back home—and I know that would be really late but. . .why didn't you say anything to me?"
      I began to cry, holding my head in my hands.
      "Because the sooner you'd get your work done, the sooner you'd be back home. I've seen you work, you're engrossed to it, and you were never satisfied. You'd never stop until there was an answer, and so I let you go, and work. Each day I hoped you were an answer closer to what you wanted, and seeing that me wedging into your life caused all. . .this," I throw my arms around in front of me to gesture about all the events. "I don't think we'll ever be normal again."
      Dad smiles small as his eyes grow glossy, and he sits next to me on the side of the bed.
      "We were never normal to begin with," He dryly laughs, but it's because of the lump in his throat. "But we can be a normal family, even though it's just the two of us. I'll think of some way to fix all this, just for you. Your mother said you'd never cause trouble, and she was right: I caused all of this. I got in over my head and dragged you along. I'm not sure if I wanted to tell you about my past and the people in it, and I may still need time for it. However, if you ask, I'll answer, but I don't want to scare you."
      I smile small at him and nod as his hand rubs my back and pats my shoulder.
      "Thanks Dad." I say softly.
      He smiles at me and gets off from the bed. "You and me kid," he holds a fist up. "You fall. . ."
      I smile, bumping his fist with my own, "I fall."
      Dad smiles and heads toward the bedroom door, but I quickly catch him before he grabs the doorknob.
      "Hey Dad," I say. "What's going to happen to us after all of this? When S.H.I.E.L.D. finds a way to cover this up, where will we be?"
Dad shrugs and sighs, slightly shaking his head. "I'm not too sure, kiddo. As conflicting as it may be, S.H.I.E.L.D. is going to make sure we're in good hands."
I nod, feeling my stomach fill with unease. "They won't separate us again, or try to?"
Dad looks away quickly. "I have a feeling that Nick understands that you understand, and that you have power yourself."
I nod as Dad opens the door.
"Love you, kiddo,"

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