Taming the Wild Waves (Formentera Series #3)

Chapter 32

I got out of my car and looked at the abandoned hospital. Dito nakatira si Mommy? What is she doing here? Sobrang luma na at bakit sa abandonang ospital pa?

I took a deep breath and went inside. My heart was pounding because I don't know what's waiting for me inside. Hindi ko pa rin nakakalimutan na baliw na ang nanay ko.

And I'm expecting Diego here. Palagi silang magkasama kaya sa tingin ko ay nandito rin ang lalaking 'yon.

I rolled my eyes around. Mabagal lang ang paglalakad ko dahil ayokong magpadalos-dalos.

"Psst..."

Mabilis akong napatingin sa narinig kong ingay at nakita ko si Mommy sa isang kwarto. Transparent ang mahabang bintana kaya nakikita ko siya.

She was just standing and staring at me.

"What are you planning to do?" Lumapit ako at sinubukang buksan ang pinto pero naka lock 'yon.

Ngumisi siya.

"Tinanong mo ako kung minahal ba kita..." aniya sa seryosong boses pero may ngisi sa mga labi.

Lumapit ako sa transparent na bintana para mas lalo ko siyang marinig. Magkalapit na kami at tanging ang bintana na lang na ito ang nagsisilbing harang sa amin.

"Have you ever loved me?" matabang kong tanong.

Hindi ko nga alam kung bakit ko pa tinatanong dahil alam ko naman na kahit kailan ay hindi niya ako minahal.

"Yes... I've loved you, Cordelia..." she said.

My forehead creased. "Talaga?" natatawang tanong ko. "Really, Mom?! Minahal mo ako?! Do you even hear yourself? You didn't love me!" Dinuro ko siya.

"Minahal kita! But you betrayed me, Cordelia! You fucking betrayed me!" sigaw niya at namuo ang mga luha sa mga mata niya.

Nakakunot lang ang noo ko sa kanya. I don't know what she's saying.

"I fed you, clothed you, loved you! But you still left me! You left your own mother!" pagpapatuloy niya.

"I just wanted you to be like me! You are my daughter so I wanted you to become like your mother!"

Hindi ako makapaniwalang nakatingin sa kanya. She really lost her mind. She's insane. "You wanted me to be like you?! Maging demonyo?! Maging halimaw?! That's what you wanted, huh, Mom?! If that's really the reason why you abused me, you're selfish! Jesus!" Napahilamos ako sa mukha gamit ang dalawang palad.

"Ikinulong, binugbog at tinanggalan ng kasiyahan, 'yan ba ang pagmamahal mo?!" Tumulo ang luha ko.

Tumulo na rin ang luha niya. "My mother did that to me, too! Kaya ganito ako! I became like her so I wanted you to become like me! We are one, Cordelia! But now? I hate you! You left me! You're a traitor! Pagkatapos kitang buhayin, iniwan mo ak—"

"Kaiwan-iwan ka, Mom... kaiwan-iwan ka..." seryosong sambit ko.

Bumagsak lalo ang luha niya. "In another life, I wouldn't want to be your daughter again. This is enough." I wiped my tears away.

"I hate you... but you are still my daughter..." she whispered.

"No." Umiling ako. "Our relationship will end here. I am not your daughter and you are not my mother anymore. Don't forget that you killed my father. I will put you in jail, you monster," mariing sambit ko at dinuro ulit siya saka tinalikuran.

"Yeah... let's end everything here..." Narinig kong sambit niya pero hindi na ako lumingon.

Pero napatigil ako nang marinig kong may bumagsak. Mabilis akong lumingon sa kanya at nanlaki ang mga mata ko nang makitang may dugo ang transparent na bintana.