Loosing control NR

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I am living with the Avengers now for two weeks. I kept my the distance from everyone due the fact that Wanda keeps ignoring me, she doesn't blame me for Pietro dead but I started to. With that I always start thinking that I might not deserve to live there with the Avengers and that I in general just don't deserve to live. All of this made me unstable which had his impact on my powers. And besides all this the redhead tries again and again to get near to me which only scare me even more because what if I hurt her? What if my powers go off? What if she starts to hate me and sees that I'm a worthless? So let's just say it brings even mor pressure on me.

"Go to the shuttles and get save!" Wanda shouted to me. "I can help, please." I begged. "Ok but stay with the redhead over there and do what she tells you to do!" Wanda says in her thick accent. I look over to the redhead who nods as an signal to follow her. "Stay save!" Wanda shouted to you while you run after the redhead. Not long after I helped a few people on the shuttles I heard some gunshots but this time something was different. I have a really bad feeling and a few seconds later I heard that they told the redhead something because she said she copied but I couldn't understand the words from the others. The redhead turns around to me and crouches down in front of me. I just keep staring at her not understanding how she could do something like this while we are fighting. A robot sneaks up behind her so I quickly destroy him with my powers. "Little one uhm- thank you for that. We need to go now ok? Can I take your hand?" I nod slowly and the next second we are running to a shuttle. It took me a while to focus again when I realised now what is different. I pull on the redheads sleeve to get her attention because I never got her name. "Yes, sweetheart?" "Where is Pietro?" I could see her face changing in something like pity. "What's your name, sweetheart? My name is Natasha." "Y/N Maximoff." She took my hands in hers but she looks like she was searching for the right words. "I can feel Wanda, weakly but I can't feel Pietro. Why can't I feel him? Where is he?" My eyes are filled with tears, something deep inside me knows the answer but I wanted to hear it. I needed to hear it. "Natasha?" My voice was light, barely audible but you could hear that I was scared, really scared. "I'm so sorry honey, I really am." She whispers. "No, no, no." I mumble and then pull my hands away from the redhead. I could tell that she is really sorry and not faking it but I can't. "No,no,no,no,no. Not dead. He isn't. No!" I was now lightly yelling. "Honey, please breathe. Long breaths." But I couldn't. I saw that the redhead hands were about to pull me back to her but I went further away from her. "No." I shouted at her. She was shocked for a second but caught herself again. "Honey, I'm not your enemy. Please may I?" She slowly puts her hand to me and I nod. She wipes my tears away, I didn't even realize I was crying. She slowly takes me in her arms. Somehow she makes me feel safe and it calms me down. I slowly pull away after a few minutes and started to lock myself up in my head. I don't wanted to feel anymore. I can hear everything what happens around me but I didn't react anymore. "Y/N?" "Y/N?" I didn't react. There were new voices. "Can someone get Wanda?" Soon after that I smells Wandas perfume. "Y/N? Please talk to me." I didn't. She tried to enter mine head but I blocked her out. "She locked herself up, she won't let me in. I can't." "It's ok." That was the voice from the redhead again. "Agent Romanoff, she trusted you on the shuffle, take her with you." The redhead nods and carefully crouches down in front of me so I could see her face. "Sweetheart, I'm gonna pick you up now, ok?" I didn't answer but my face softened. She slowly and carefully picks me up.

I was down in the training room and tried to train my powers to get more control over it but the memory brings all the bad feelings back. The fact that I couldn't produce any energy balls makes me even more frustrated.
Bang!

Natasha pov:

Bang!
"Friday, what was that?" I ask Tonys KI because I know I am nearly alone in the new base.
"The loud bang came from the train room." Oh god, Y/N is down in the training room. I jump out of my chair and run down to the training room.
There she was trembling, crying and her powers go crazy. Her powers fly through her hands and shoots everything around her. The loud bang must have been the shelf.
"Y/N?" I ask her carefully.
After she locked herself up, I took her with me, not only because it was a order but because I saw something in her. I took care of her while she was locked up in her head and after she came back I was the only one who could at least get a bit to her. So I just hope I can get to her again.
"Leave." She whispers.
"I'm not gonna leave, sweetheart."
"Don't call me like that, I'm not your child, I'm no ones anymore, I'm an orphan."
I slowly walk nearer to her and when I'm near enough I crouch down to her.
"It's ok, I won't call you like that again. I never wanted to replace your parents, but I can be there for you if you just let me."
Her power starts to calm down down a bit so they don't reach out anymore and just flow through her body.
"Stay away, I don't wanna hurt you. Please."
She begged.
"Please." She whispers again.
"It's ok, it's ok. You not gonna hurt me, I know you won't. I trust you so please put just a little trust in me. I'm begging you, please." I say calmly.
I carefully lift my hand to hers but again she tries to move away from me.
"It's ok, it's ok. I'm not gonna hurt you and you are not gonna hurt me. See?" I take her hand and nothing happens because her powers stopped completely and she just didn't notice.
I slowly take her in my arms and she let it happened. I let her cry into my chest till she calms down. "It's ok, love. It's ok. I'm here and I will always be here for you and if you are ok with it, I'm gonna take care of you. You are only a kid, you don't have to go through all this alone." I whisper into her ear.
"Thank you." She whispers. I slowly pick her up, bring her to my room and lay down with her. "Sleep a bit, I can tell you are tired. You are safe. You are safe with me."
With that she fall asleep pretty quickly. I don't think she ever slept till she's with us.

Oneshots Natasha Romanoff & Scarlett JohanssonUnde poveștirile trăiesc. Descoperă acum