The meaning of protecting you with my life

Considering a very hard (or perhaps not so hard) decision

That night, Wei Wuxian could not sleep at all. Lan Zhan was already long gone in the dreamland by his side but the Yunmeng Jiang sect head disciple's mind was going a thousand miles a second, not allowing him even the shortest moment of rest.

He was thinking hard about what Lan Zhan – his husband, he could still not believe it! – had told him. It was not like he had not secretly considered and perhaps ever wanted to leave the whole cultivation world which he no longer belonged to behind and live life free of any heavy expectations. The prospects of travelling around with the love of his life, night hunting every now and then and otherwise just having fun and helping people in need was extremely tempting. Even more so because he had no golden core so he could no longer be a proper part of any cultivation sect. Who would accept him with his demonic cultivation?

Sure, his family was treating him well and they seemed happy to be around him. But he was certain that they had reservations about his cultivation path. The fact that they had not voiced them was in his eyes only the matter of time. He felt like making only one wrong step could change everything in a blink of an eye. The only one who seemed to have truly accepted his only option left was Lan Zhan. He had said so himself and his sincere eyes did not leave Wei Wuxian to wonder if he had genuinely meant it.

And so now, he was torn inside. On one hand, he actually wanted to leave and lead a simple and happy life together with his husband. On the other hand, he was afraid to do so. His family was clearly showing him that they cared about him and that they loved him. It would sadden them if he wanted to leave.

And then there was still the matter of the power balance between the great sects. Even though Jiang Cheng had assured him that there was no problem and had showed him letters from Nie Mingjue and Lan Xichen stating just that, he still doubted that his disappearance would not cause a discord. The Lanling Jin sect was now under reconstruction and Jin Zixuan had his work cut out for him, that did not however mean that it was powerless either. They could still have a use for their piece of the Yin iron, just as the Gusu Lan sect and the Qinghe Nie sect. Since there was no fourth piece, Wei Wuxian was standing in its stead. If he was to leave, it would put the Yunmeng Jiang sect at a disadvantage; and its position was still too fragile after the fall of Lotus Pier and deaths of more than a half of their disciples.

Unless, there was a thought which was making itself more and more pronounced as Wei Wuxian was thinking about leaving, there was a way to assure peace in the cultivation world. The Yunmeng Jiang sect would have to secure a powerful alliance with all three other great sects. Then, there would be no need for any power displays as they would be meaningless between family and allies.

Wei Wuxian was turning this idea in his head and hope was blossoming in his heart. This could actually work! He and Lan Wangji were basically already married, securing so a family bond with the Gusu Lan sect. They just needed to make their union known to the cultivation world. Jiang Yanli was once again engaged to Jin Zixuan, the wedding would surely not be far off. This time, the new Lanling Jin sect leader was treating his sister well so Wei Wuxian had nothing against him.

That only left the Qinghe Nie sect. Although Wei Wuxian was pretty sure that Nie Mingjue would not abuse his sect's power, there could still be an imbalance there which someone could take advantage of. They could try to drive an edge between them and cause some kind of dispute or ill blood. It was too risky to just leave things like that. Nie Huisang could perhaps help in smoothing things over out of friendship but that could also not last forever. There would need to be a more solid relationship. Perhaps he should ask Wen Qing for any tips, after all, she was now part of the Qinghe Nie sect.

Yes! That was it! Wei Wuxian smiled into the darkness of the room. Why had he not realized this sooner?

Since Wen Qing was basically Nie Qing now even if she preferred her old name to be used, this could all work out. If Jiang Cheng and she would also marry – Wei Wuxian had clearly seen that they cared much about each other, he only did not know to what extend they had discussed their future plans – then all four great sects would become tied together and there would be no need for any power struggles between them. If any new threats would arise in the future, they would just face them as one.

If it was not the middle of the night and he was not worried that he would disturb Lan Zhan's sleep, Wei Wuxian would have jumped out of his bed and start dancing around and cheering loudly. He would have run to Jiang Cheng to tell him everything and to ask for permission to leave on a journey with Lan Zhan. Not permanently, just to get a short break and then come back when he would be ready to face the cultivation world again. He needed some time to think and relax.

Suddenly, Wei Wuxian yawned wide. His body was telling him that it was time to go to sleep at last and his mind agreed. An immense burden had just been lifted from his shoulders because of reaching his decision and now he felt exhausted from today's events.

He smiled again, happy with how things had turned out. Just a few hours before, he would have never thought that there was any way for him to get a break but here he was now, planning a honeymoon journey with his husband. Things really could change fast, could they not? He was only a little nervous about facing his family and informing them that he had been married for more than a year already and introduce his husband officially.

His tired eyelids could not stay open anymore and he was not about to fight with them. He let them close and slowly drifted to dreamland. His smile stayed on his lips when he was dreaming about travelling with his husband and just enjoying each other's company, not tied up by any regulations and not burdened by expectations, far away from the politics of the cultivation world.