2 : Realisation

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I was five when I first understood, through a movie, as much as I could, about love

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I was five when I first understood, through a movie, as much as I could, about love. I asked Mumma about it and she said

"A guy will come into your life who will make you the happiest you've ever been, and not because you weren't happy before, but because you love the version of yourself that comes out of you, when you are with him. You won't be dependent on him for happiness yet he will do his utmost best to make you happy, and you too will be at your happiest when you see him happy. You both will feel the need to be around each other, not for money or materialistic things like a plane for you or a monster truck for him, but because you will feel complete and at peace with each other. Their mere presence makes you very happy..."

And my only answer was
" Like when I am with Arhaan? "

Mumma was shocked for a second, then she laughed and said
" Yes....exactly like that. So if you feel like that even after growing up, then my dear darling, you are in love. "

The moment Mumma completed her sentence, I ran to Haans's house and stood in front of him.

He kept asking me what I was doing, but I just kept staring at him while thinking about Mumma's words. Even though I was a tiny baby, I felt the happiest when I was with him, not with my other classmates, my new friends, not even with my parents, just Haans. And I didn't need him to give me chocolate or toys to feel that way, I was happy just to be with him, even if we were just sitting and doing homework.

And I realized, in that delicate age, in my tiny babbling brain, that I was in love.

Others may think that was stupid, but I was happy, in fact, happiest, and what else would a five-year-old want?

I was sure about my feelings, yet I kept looking for signs, and over the years I saw them all. I was still the happiest when I was with him. We sure have our own goals and dreams, but we just wanted to achieve them together.

When I grew up a little I saw the signs even for him. Even he didn't need anything materialistic to be with me, he was and still is the happiest and the most real version of himself only in front of me.

He has fun with his guy friends, but we crave at least some time together every day. Doesn't matter if it's for just an hour. And it was from both sides.

With the years I too became clearer about mine and his feelings, I did find a few guys cute, but none could take my breath away like him. And no one could light up our eyes like it does when we see each other.

It could have been a child's thought when I was five, but now, at the age of seventeen, it isn't just puppy love and with the more people noticing and confirming it, the more I became sure. And everybody also says that he loves me too, he just doesn't know it, but I didn't need anybody else's opinion, I can read my Haans's eyes.

It wasn't just about that, he respected and understood me. Sure he behaves like a lunatic with me but he was way ahead of our school guys.

He didn't leave my side even when the school guys tried to make him think that it was high time he either gets in my pants or gets away from me so he could enjoy his teenage. The thought of multiple sexual partners is apparently a tag of "cool dude".

𝕺𝖚𝖗 𝕱𝖔𝖗𝖊𝖛𝖊𝖗 𝖀𝖙𝖔𝖕𝖎𝖆Where stories live. Discover now