Nemesism | GLEE

seventy nine | a katy or a gaga

With his arms crossed over his chest and his eyebrows raised, Christian eyed all of the Glee Clubbers, including Jake Puckerman, who chose to enter the choir room via scooter, before looking over at Mr. Schuester when he said to them, "Alright, big week, guys." As he waved a hand, Mr. Schuester said to them, "Come on. Gather round. I have here in my hand– drumroll, please–"

While the others actually gave Mr. Schuester a drumroll, Christian did nothing but simply eye his Spanish teacher, who told them, "a secret list of the show choirs that we will be in competition with at Nationals in six weeks. Okay, let's see what we've got. We got the Rust-Belters from Pittsburgh, the Thunder Showcats from Gainesville and finally, from Fort Wayne, Throat Explosion."

It was then that Tina yelled, "No! Why, God?!"

While Christian only raised his eyebrows in response to Tina's reaction, Jake said, "Uh, what? Throat Explosion? That's a joke, right?"

Blaine told him, "Anything but. They're the new supergroup the Show Choir Underground's been buzzing about. Their budget for costume, makeup, hair alone are astronomical. You guys have read that Malcolm Gladwell book Outliers, right?" When no one responded, Blaine said to them, "So, Gladwell says you can't possibly master anything unless you've spent ten-thousand hours practicing it."

While Cameron leaned in towards Christian and quietly asked him 'is that why you're so good at fighting people' and Christian only shrugged in response, Blaine said to them, "So students can't even join Throat Explosion without proving they've logged in ten-thousand hours of show choir rehearsal. They don't even go to class. They just perform, every minute of every day. They live their art. They know no boundaries. They're constantly pushing the envelope, living and performing on the edge. They're like mini Lady Gagas."

With a shake of her head, Tina said, "We're so screwed— they're not like Vocal Adrenaline, who were unfeeling Borg robots." While Christian only raised his eyebrows and shrugged in response, Tina told them, "They're total outsiders and misfits, which used to be our niche. We can't compete with Throat Explosion anymore at that level because we lost our biggest Gaga when Kurt graduated last year. Look around. We're a room full of, like, Katy Perrys now."

It was then that Wade said to her, "Oh, you best check your spectrum, Queen T, because orange is the new black, and Unique is the new Gaga."

Tina replied, "Well, not Marley– she's a Katy Perry. So is Sam, so is Blaine."

With his hand raised, Blaine told them, "I'm a Katy Perry and I'm proud of it."

Then Mr. Schuester said, "Uh, the truth is, Tina, we're a potent mix of Katy Perrys and Lady Gagas in here. But it's not a liability– it's the way we're gonna beat Throat Explosion. Now, some of us in here are-are, you know, ambi-edge."

Artie replied, "Ambi-edge? You just made that up."

While Christian did nothing but chuckle to himself in response, Mr. Schuester said to them, "Uh, some of us are more, you know, wholesome, innocent, romantic, all-American girl- and boy-next-door types. Uh, who in here would describe themselves as a Gaga?"