freaks

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It couldn't be that hard, right.

That's how I ended up having a staring competition with my reflection in the mirror for the next week trying to figure out how to hide my wings. During the first day I was added to the discord chat by Phil and everyone was told who I was. I was quickly welcomed by everyone and texted the group everyday, answering questions about myself and asking the others a few of my own until I became a tiny bit more comfortable.

After no success for a week I called someone in the group other than Phil for the first time since he was busy. I was staring at the names on my phone until I spotted Bad and remembered someone mentioning he learned to hide his wings in the least amount of time. I stared at his name anxiously for another few minutes before I got the courage to call.

I heard the discord ringtone a few times before he picked up," Hi (y/n), it's nice to finally talk to you." He said cheerfully.

"Ummm yeah same, also can I ask a quick question please," I asked nervously trying not to stumble over my words.

"Sure, also no need to be nervous. If you need to pause and take a deep breath," he replied, so I did. "Feel better now?" Bad asked.

"Yeah a little," I said,"So how were you able to turn your wings invisible? I've already tried staring at my wings in a mirror, thinking about them going invisible, thinking about before I got them, keeping them still, moving them randomly and as a last resort I tried meditation. Any ideas on how to make them invisible?" I asked.

"Everyone has there own way of making their own sort of trigger to turn their wings invisible for the first time. Once you find it you just need to focus to make them reappear and you can then practise turning them invisible without without it." Bad said giving me hope.

"How did you first hide your wings," I asked.

"It was when I saw what looked like a white rat laying in my back garden. Luckily I looked closer and saw it was an injured stray puppy. I knew I couldn't just leave her there so I awkwardly tucked my wings underneath my sweater, ran out side to get her and careful brought her inside. I took care of her for the rest of the day and didn't get any sleep that night because I was too worried about her. The next day she looked a lot better so I relaxed slightly and noticed my wings disappeared. My guess is that it was helping her," Bad said.

"Did you keep her," I asked after listening carefully to Bad's story.

"Yeah I named her Lucy although I ended up giving her the nickname Rat," he said happily.

"Awww so that's how you got Rat," I said smiling. "Well thanks for talking to me Bad. I think I'll take a break for now then keep trying different things later," I said greatfully.

"I think everyone would agree that your always welcome to call any of us. I'll text you in a few hours to check up on you, good luck" he replied.

"Ok. Bye Bad," I said and with that I ended the call happy as I grabbed some snacks.

I sat on my bed and played games on my phone for a few hours giving myself the first proper break I had other than eating and a few hours of sleep each night.

At about 11pm I noticed that it was late so I put in some earphones and started to listen to different songs, from video game ost's to Lovejoy and Hamilton, eventually this lead me to the song Freaks by Surf Curse (really good song would recommend). I started to sing it quietly and closed my eyes. The first time I heard the song I just liked the beat however. Now I feel like I can actually relate to the lyrics as if this was just a dream, the lyrics don't make me feel bad about myself instead they make me happy that I'm unique with or without my wings.

Once the song finished  I opened my eyes and went to the bathroom to brush my teeth before bed. While brushing my teeth I looked towards the mirror and I could no longer see my wings. "I did it but what caused it," I thought to myself, suddenly it hit me. "The song," I said with excitement.

I focused just like Bad said to and they became visible again. I rushed downstairs to show my mam, nearly falling down by doing so. "You ok (y/n)?" She asked.

"I'm better than ok, watch this," I said excitedly.

"Oh no famous last words," my mam said laughing slightly. I roll my eyes with a smile and start to sing the beginning. My back felt like it had goosebumps and by the end of the first verse I heard my mam gasp."You figured out how to turn them invisible," She said excitedly clapping her hands and my only response was a smile.

It was now midnight so I said goodnight to my mam and I went to bed feeling proud of the progress I made.

N/a: What did you think of Rats backstory. If anyone has any suggestions of things to add leave a comment and if you enjoy the book why not vote :D

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