Chapter 21

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The club isn't as busy as I expect it to be. But it was one of the smaller gay bars in the city. My sister was clearly taking it easy on me tonight and although I was a little offended that she thought I couldn't handle it, I was also grateful. Because I couldn't- I can barely handle this. Sitting in the corner booth with my sister and Amber while the music beats low and slow. They talk quietly amongst each other. They'd tried to pull me into the conversation many times but I barely heard it.

People watching was much easier than watching my sister and the love of her life dance around each other on tip toes. It was actually kind of annoying. She had everything she wanted right in front of her and she refused to take it. I wasn't sure if it was pride or fear that held her back but I'd decided that watching them interact made me want to throw drinks at them. There wasn't a damn thing that stood between them. They both knew how crazy they were about the other. They both refuse to get serious with anyone else.

Someday I'll tell them how stupid they're both being, but today is not that day. Not in a gay bar. Not when I'm already in a sour mood. And not when they both seem to be relatively happy. I wasn't that mean.

My vision blurs as someone steps in front of me.

I look up- it's the bartender with our drinks. My eyebrows tug together- why didn't the waitress bring them?

The bartender lowers herself, setting the drinks of the table. Her short blonde hair falls just over her shoulder, brushing over my fingers that grip the table. I'm surprised when I don't feel the need to rip my hand away.

She passes the first drink to my sister, the second to Amber then straightens with my vodka cranberry in hand.

"I think that's mine." I say a little breathlessly.

She smiles. Her teeth are perfect, straight and white. It's a weird thing to notice but it makes her more attractive. She's tall but she's not tiny. She looks like she plays soccer with thick thighs and a slim waist. It's hard to tell through the black baggy t-shirt she wears but the black skinny jeans don't lie. She's stunning. Ruffled blonde hair and warm amber eyes. A sharp jaw and slender nose black hoop through the right side.

"I think it might be." She says, holding the glass in front of me so I have to take it from her hand. Her fingers brush mine and I remember why I like women. Even her fingertips are soft.

"Thank you," I say.

My sister clears her throat somewhere behind us and I jump. The bartender looks startled too. And she takes a step away. "We're going to go dance." My sister says, the pointed look she gives me as she slips out of the booth is impossible to ignore. I nearly roll my eyes at her.

"Best friend?" The woman asks, drawing my attention back to her.

"Sister," I say. "So arguably worse."

She laughs and looks down at her shoes. "Are you busy?" She asks, glancing up at me through dark lashes and biting her bottom lip. I wasn't sure anyone could say no to that. She probably knew it too.

"Aren't you on the clock?" I nod my head to the bar.

"I just got off."

I bite my lip. She knew damn well I wasn't busy. I'm sure she'd seen me staring at the crowd for the last half hour with a glazed look on my face. And god knows I needed a distraction. Maybe that was fucked up to use someone like that, but this was a bar- I certainly don't think she's asking for a proposal. Just fun. And I needed fun as much as she did.

So I give her a small smile. "No, no I'm not busy." I slide over in the booth and let her slide in beside me. Her jeans brush against mine and her large black T-shirt bunches in her lap.

She turns to face me, her head is only a few inches away from mine. My eyes flick down to her lips and back up.

Damn my sister. I hate that she was right.

"I've never seen you here before." She says, her voice a little raised over the sound of the music.

I run my fingers down my my v-neck shirt. I hadn't wanted to wear it, it went so low on my chest you could see my black bra peaking out. But now- with this woman eyeing it, eyeing me. I wasn't as mad about it. "Probably because I've never been." I smile.

She chuckles. "That would make sense," She pauses when another song starts loud and heavy. "I'm Bec."

"Ivy."

"I don't usually do this you know."

"Approach women in bars?"

Bec laughs. "Okay, I've done that," she leans in closer. "I just mean, I don't usually do it in my bar like basically during my shift. I usually have a lot more class than that." Her hand shifts under the table to cover mine and tingles break out under my skin. I try not to shiver as her thumb draws circles on the back of my hand.

"I must be special." I say. The words come out low and husky- almost like I don't want anyone to hear but there's nobody around to hear anyways.

"You have this darkness about you," she says and I freeze. "I wanted to know more." As if sensing my hesitation she jokes "It also helps that you're gorgeous."

I smile and I try to let the rest fall down my back. But it wouldn't. Couldn't.

Not when my mother used to tell me the same damn thing.

You have a darkness and you know it. Don't let it swallow you.

The truth is, we all have a darkness. I think maybe I let mine leak out more than most do. And it makes me vulnerable to comments like this.

Like people asking me if I'm okay in the middle of the grocery isle when they don't even know me. Like one of my old bosses when I was teen putting me on suicide watch because he was worried.

Just things that people don't do or say about bright and shiny people.

But fuck it- today I was going to be bright and fucking shiny if it killed me. Because even if I was dark- I wasn't going to let it control my life anymore. I wasn't going to sit in apartment and feel sorry for myself anymore. I was going to start living again. And not just working- but living. The way I wanted to.

I pulled Bec's hand toward me and brought my other hand to cup her face. Her eyes lit as she leaned into me and our lips met.

Her lips caressed mine, gentle but demanding. Her tongue ran along my bottom lip but didn't try to force its way into my mouth. My hand released hers and I reached around her, putting a hand on her lower back and pulling her closer. She let out a soft little whimper and fuck- it was hot. Her thigh lifted over mine and our calves tangled together as our lips kept moving.

But it was short lived as I heard a very familiar sound. I pulled away from Bec who looks genuinely confused. Her lips were puffy and red from our kisses and I'm sure mine were too. "Did you hear that?" I ask, turning back to look at the club. The crowd had gotten smaller but everything else seemed fine. My sister and Amber were now sitting in a booth in a corner by the entrance giggling and sipping their drinks.

"Hear w_"

Three gun shots ring out loud and clear this time. I shove Bec down under the table- manners be damned. "Stay here." I yell over the screams and the music still blaring from the speakers.

I look for my sister, I can't see her but I'm hoping she's hiding somewhere or even made it out the door. I start to run that way but running through a crowd of screaming people was extremely difficult.

A round of gunshots hit something. It sounds like it just hit wood but I can't be sure. But this time, to my surprise, the crowd freezes.

"Nobody move!" The voice sends chills down my spine. "Nobody moves until I find Poison."

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