Innocents 💠Slow Updates

Balls

~I don't play baseball so I don't know if all my info is correct I do google some of the terms and what not but the stand and all that I'm winging it so please just pretend it's right if it isn't ~

The machine shots the ball into the dark night sky. The bright lights illuminating the clear area, bright and glowing. I effortlessly swing with a cling the ball shoots off into the distance, for a moment I could watch it before it disappeared into darkness. I giggle my arm before getting back into position doing it all over again. The hot air fanning my face with every swing. When I wasn't sending the balls into darkness I would look up wishing for a moment that the bright lights didn't hide all the stars that where no doubt coving the clear sky.

"Your dad said you might be down here" I glance behind me seeing Jay leaning against the fence but I don't do anything other than get into position to hit the ball. "You missed one yet" "nope" my answer was quick and short much like the balls time near me. I didn't want to talk and I was hoping he would get the hint. "So he may have let it drop that you haven't gone into the firehouse alone or stayed there while they are on a call" the clink sends the ball off into the darkness "didn't realise you gossip about me" i said my eyes watching the ball shot into the sky fast coming in my direction. "We don't gossip" I swung my bat the clink telling me it made contact. "Teach me" I pause missing the ball making me jump out of the way so I don't get hit. "You ruined my rhythm" I whine he doesn't care just comes in jogging with his own bat. "You haven't missed one ball so teach me how to" "you can hit a target with a snipe from miles away perfectly yet you can't hit a baseball coming towards you" "who said I couldn't" he smirks at me making me step back "you feet aren't even" "what" he looks over at me missing the ball "if you hit the ball repeatedly like that you will start to get pain because your using your leg to much" he just watches me stunned "it's my favourite thing I know how to do it" I snap making him step back getting into position before swing the clink bring an instant smile to my face. "Ok so" "feet need to in a line triangle body you swing with your arms you use your shoulders they will hurt you bend your body into it" he follows my instructions i watch him carefully. He hits it perfectly "Talk about faking" "what" he spins facing me "you faked being bad to get me to teach you don't know why" I force him out of the way swinging hitting ball after ball. The clink music to my ears. "I want to tell you that it's ok to feel the way you do about the firehouse" I squeeze my bat till my knuckles turn white "I don't know what your talking about" "so you just hold the bat that tightly naturally we both know that you need to be more relaxed for the perfect swing" I don't answer I just focus on the machine chugging away sending the ball into the darkness. I miss it I was to stiff. It wasn't one fluid motion, more like a robot needing oil. I move my head, rolling my shoulders. "I'm not going away so the tense feeling isn't either" he said leaning against the fence smirking.

I puff out hair. My heart beating in my ears "you want me to tell you what I really feel" I snap gently dropping my bat. "Love that" he was casually leaning against the fence smirking with his arms cross "every time I go there I hear them shouting, I hear the bangs going off like drills in my head, I see the glass shattering across the room" "feel better" "no if anything I feel worse" I quickly grab my bat before walking over to the ball machine turning it off. I make my way to the exit only to be stopped by Jay "I know ok I knew the moment you couldn't go back inside" "good for you" I go to step around him "wait just wait I knew what it was like because every time I hear a helicopter I'm back there every time I see this yellowed coloured bag like sunflower yellow I'm back there remembering my friends who were killed" he said causing me to stumble back "why sunflower yellow" my voice was small "one of the guys in my unit had one we always made fun of him because it was the opposite of camouflage" he told me causing me to nod before looking around. "I notice how you tensed how you zoned out so quickly you don't think I didn't know you were seeing things remembering. I recognised all the signs because I've been there" I sigh running my hand through my hair "how do I" "if I knew to make it stop I would have ages ago" I wrap my arms around him needing a hug more than anything. He leads me out his arm resting on my shoulder "why didn't the sound of guns bother you" "that I can't tell you" I nod "how do you" "ignore it focus on other things normally when a helicopter is around I'm on a case so I make sure that is my only focus" "I can't do that" "we'll figure it out" I glance at him before picking up my bag that was on a nearby bench making sure to put my bat inside. "I dream about it" he nods "there real" "I know not that you dreamt about it but the dreams were real not the normal nightmare type" I slowly nod "what do I say to dad I can't" "I already told him at the firehouse when I took you in" he told me making me sigh "how bout I send him a message and you come back to mine we can watch movies" I didn't know what to do "uh" "it will be fun" he said making me sigh and nod. Truth was I could do with a movie night. I just hadn't been to anyones house outside Herman, Matt and Erin no matter how close I am to them. May seem like a lot but compared to everyone at the firehouse it isn't all that many.