•°Chapter 38°•

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🦋HUGE TRIGGER WARNING:

Mentions and descriptions of abuse and rape!

Please do not read this if you get flashbacks or can't handle reading things like that!♡

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Chan tried not to get even more nauseous as he changed his attire and put on some more casual and laid back clothes - in contrast to the ones he usually wears for his lectures and classes.

He felt like throwing up at the thought of Jungwha arriving soon, but nonetheless he tried to clean the dorm and tidy everything up as much as possible.

The recent two times they've met up were absolute horror and he was already scared of only being in the same room alone with him.

Eventually, he heard a knock on the door and he knew, that he had to be very careful with every single word he was about to say in those following two to three hours.

Going up to the door and cautiously opening it, a boy with dark, long hair in a man bun appeared in front of him.

He was tall, his outfit almost consisting of black elements only, jewelry on his neck, wrists, and fingers and his hands were resting inside the pockets of his black jeans. He'd be an amazingly looking guy, if it wasn't for his disgusting personality, lack of humanity and lust for money.

"H-hey Jungie, come in." Chan tried to put on his best smile as he moved to the side to allow the taller to walk inside.

The boy didn't say anything at first, but reached forward to take a hold of the boy's waist, pulling him forward and closer to himself. It was a harsh and abrupt pull, catching Chan off guard and making him scrunch his eyes as it happened.

Those arms around his waist didn't feel safe or warm, they just made it feel like he was trapped and full of fear.

"Look at me." He sternly said, his voice deep and scary. Chan shakily, opened his eyes, traveling his arms up to the others neck and wrapping them around it, somehow trying to convince Junghwa - and maybe even himself – that he liked this.

"What were you doing earlier?"

"The usual.. y-you know. Attended my classes and then came back.." He responded, trying to somehow keep the eye contact without feeling like he was about to cry. He didn't like this and didn't want to be this close to him, feeling uncomfortable and scared of saying something wrong and getting punished again.

"Is that it?"

Chan thought back to when Hyunjin had knocked on the door earlier and as if magically, he was practically able to feel his lingering touch on his neck and face again. He was able to hear his voice in his head, hurting as he knew how much pain was mixed into his tone.

He thought back to the short time they had spent together, falling in love so quickly as if they were meant for each other. Now all of that had crumbled apart and all that was left were these feelings of love for the younger, which were never going to be returned anymore.

"Y-yes that's it.."

Junghwa looked at him as if he could look through him, as if he could read his mind, but it wasn't a good type of feeling.

He didn't feel understood like with Hyunjin, but rather scared of being exposed, scared of the other figuring out that he was lying.

"H-hyung..?" He spoke up again when the other hadn't said anything, just stared at him with a look he couldn't read, eyes that had all sorts of intentions with him, but he just couldn't figure out which ones.

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