"Nope. Nuh uh. Absolutely not." Gray yelled.
"He hardly ever even buys me alcohol. No way I'm asking for your little shit of a sister, no offense." After Gray got out of practice I asked him to pick me up so we could go get food. My parents had gotten food for us on the way home, but I needed to get out of that house, and away from my sister.
"None taken. She's a little shit."
"I don't even understand why's she's blackmailing you. She has no right. And it's not like you and Riley are even still together. Or are you? You two are weird and this whole broken up but still fucking, but still kind of friends, but kind of not is confusing me." Gray was swinging his arms around while he had his drink in one hand and a french fry in the other.
"Yep, me too."
"Like what even happened today? You were supposed to come home with me then you went with her. Did you guys do the deed or what?"
"Or what."
"How'd that go?" I explained to him the details of my afternoon. He just sat there quiet while I talked and he ate. When I finished relaying the events of the day he took in a deep breath, let it out, then said,
"Girls are crazy. All of them. Every single one of you are absolutely bat shit crazy." I just started laughing. He's right. We are all crazy. After we stopped laughing and things got sort of quiet I just looked at him. He rolled his eyes.
"Fine. I'll ask. But he's probably going to say no."
"I honestly want him to say no. She's fourteen. What does she need alcohol for? We didn't even start drinking until like, last semester."
"He's going to kick my ass. He'll make me do something stupid just for asking. He always does. He's such an asshole about this stuff."
"I know. But just try, and if he says no then whatever. Lauren will just tell my parents and I'll be out officially and then my whole world will implode."
"So dramatic. I'll ask." I just put my head in my hands. How did this happen? Riley and I haven't spoken since before she dropped me off. I am eternally indebted to my conniving, manipulative, horrendous sister. Everything is just falling apart.
"Stop that."
"Stop what?"
"Stop falling into that big ole head of yours."
"Everything is just collapsing around me. What if Lauren just decides to tell them? What if she decides to tell the whole school? Riley would never speak to me again."
"Yeah like she's even talking to you now." I felt my face drop and it felt like my heart shattered.
"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that." Gray responded immediately. I felt a tear roll down my cheek.
"Tess, I'm sorry. I am. I shouldn't have said that." I took off my glasses and wiped my eyes.
"The worst part is, I don't even know what she's thinking. Does she love me still? Is she just wanting sex? She said she didn't but what if that's all she wants? I don't know if she's okay, I don't know what she's feeling. I don't know anything. I just want to make her feel okay, and I want her to make me feel like I'm okay." Gray put his hand on my head.
"You're both going to be fine." I just rolled my eyes. Easy for him to say. Boys are so callus. They're so tough and rigid sometimes. I know all boys aren't like that, but it's how Gray is sometimes. He is right though. It's not the end of the world, it feels like it's the end of my world.
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Gray and I had to wait until Friday for his brother would finally tell us if he was going to buy it for us or not. Gray and his brother don't get along very well. His brother lives in town, only a 25-minute drive from us, but they hardly see each other. His brother and parents had a falling out some time after he graduated. Gray and I were barely freshman when that happened, so we don't know all the details.
His brother told us that he would bring us the alcohol after we got out of school. Seeing how Gray has a game that made things complicated. When the final bell rang Gray and I met his brother across the street from the school so we could get it. We had to be fast though because Gray still had to get food and be back at the school by 4:45. His game doesn't start until 6 but they want them all there and accounted for early. Once we'd gotten the stuff in the back of my car Gray looked at his brother and just said
"Thanks." To which his brother replied
"You owe me." I saw Gray roll his eyes then say
"Are you coming to the game?" His brother physically became uncomfortable at the question.
"Probably not. I have some things to do today." Gray just said okay, and we left. I wondered if Gray really wanted him there or if he just wanted to guilt trip him so he wouldn't owe him anything. Either way we left and went back to the school after we had picked him up some food.
Lauren had been texting and asking me all week if I was going to get her stuff, as if I really had a choice. In the middle of the week she upped her grocery list from just a six pack to a six pack and a bottle of whatever. It made me so angry. We had already been having to beg Grays brother for just a six pack and now she wants a bottle too. I hate freshman.
Once we'd gotten back to the school Gray and I sat on the bleachers while he ate his food. I always liked sitting with him when the gym was empty before the game. It was like the calm before the storm, because soon the entire gym would be filled with screaming fans, each side wanting more than anything to win. Of course, I always want Gray to win, but in the end, I feel like it doesn't matter all that much if they do. I know winning and sports are big accomplishments but I'd rather just skate through high school with my head down low and no one noticing who I am, or paying attention to what I do.
"I'm going to kill your sister if she does this again." Gray said bringing me out of my trance.
"You have my blessing."
"She has no right to even blackmail you."
"I guess."
"Why don't you just do the same thing back to her?"
"What do you mean?"
"I mean you've caught her doing plenty of shady shit. Why not just threaten to snitch?" He has a point.
"I mean what about that one time you caught her sneaking back into the house at 3:30 in the morning. Or that one time when your parents went out of town and she invited all her little friends over." He said.
"I don't want to stoop to her level. And even so those are little things. Yeah, she'd get in trouble, but those secrets wouldn't blow up our entire family."
"Yeah okay. Point made." We sat in the gym just talking for the rest of the time we had. At around 5:15 his coach called all the boys to the court to start warming up, people had already started filing in, one after another. A few minutes after Gray went down, the other team showed up and started warming up on the opposite side of the court. I just looked around. I could see Charlette's little group coming in, with Riley leading the pack. We'll see how this goes. Good luck Gray.
YOU ARE READING
With or without you
RomanceTessa loved her. Now she has to move on, but how do you move on from the love of your life?