Shades of our Love

Down the memory lane..

Shivaay was walking down a pathway that was familiar. It was the way to the playground. His parents use to often take him there with someone he missed dearly. Who was it? The red colour sea-saw was moving up and down. He could hear the laughter of the other children around but no one was visible to him. It was as if he was in a parallel dimension. It was the same familiar smells, voices. He walked towards the swings. These were his favourites. At times he was scared as the swing lifted up him in the air. But he loved the feeling of air rushing through his hair. He loved that his feet would dangle up in air; he felt like a bird with wings. He felt free and closer to the clouds. But he often had to give up on riding on the swings. Though it made him sad, he remember someone that he loved and cared for unconditionally, was always scared of them, and insisted on playing in the sand pit instead. Shivaay hated the sand. He hated that it went inside his shoes, and he recall not wanting to get his hands dirty. But he had to. He had to play hours and hours in the sand, to make someone else happy. Even though it felt like torture, he did it happily. He knew this person mattered to him. This person was a part of him. Someone who he knew even before coming out to this world. Someone he had a deep connection with. If he was in pain, he felt it. If he was happy he felt it. It was a complicated feeling to describe, but it was as if they were bonded for life. "Shivaay Baba...come it's time to go home!" He recalled his favourite driver; Bandar chacha, calling him. There he was, the man with his moustache, and big smile. Bandar Chacha, use to often stop by the play ground before taking him home, after pre-school. The image of the friendly driver soon dissipated. The sky was getting darker than the usual bright sunny ones. He could hear the creaking of the swing. An image of his younger self, wiping off the sand from his hands ran towards them. He saw the bright smile in his younger self, as he dashed across the playground towards the swings. "SHIV BHAI!" Someone dear to him called him back. He was too busy running towards his favourite swings. "BHAI..." The voice called again, and he didn't turn around. It was almost time to go home, and this was his last chance he'll get to have a go at it; to feel free, to feel like a bird. "SHIV BHA..." He  finally, turned around sensing, whoever this was really needed him.  He saw a woman in a mask, dragging away the other little boy, who was playing with him in the sand pit earlier. The one that he left behind so that he could finally get on the swings.  He ran towards them. "WAIT...WAIT FOR ME!" He screamed. He ran towards them as fast as he could. They both disappeared into thin air, leaving him alone in the play ground. He stood there alone crying. "Come back...don't go!" Shivaay watched as his younger self wandered around the play ground sobbing. He knelt down beside him, placed a hand on his shoulder. His younger self looked up at him with teary blue eyes, and dissipated.  "Wait! COME BACK! " He called out. His voice echoed through the empty play ground.

He was soon transported to the Oberoi mansion. All he could hear was his mothers wailing. "BRING HIM BACK SHAKTI....BRING MY SON BACK HOME!". She was shaking his father, breaking down. He could see defeat in his fathers eyes. "Mom..Mom...I am here! I am right here" He knelt down beside her trying to hold her. But it was as if he was a ghost. "SHRAVAAN!" Pinky howled in pain. Shravaan? But..but his name was Shivaay! Who was his mother calling out to? Who was she crying her heart out for? Suddenly the surroundings transformed again. This time it was a dark, dingy, room. "I...I know this place...this is..this is where I..I met S.S.O!" He muttered. He could see his younger self chained to the walls, shivering and crying in the dark. He could hear sobbing from the other corner of the small dark room. "Shiv Bhai...Bhai..I am scared...so scared...I want momma!" The same little boy he was playing in the sand pit. He could recognise the voice, though the face was not clear. He was scared himself. He could feel it. It was a dangerous place. Suddenly a door opened. The woman in the mask, singing an eerie lullaby walked in. "Ha, now now...which one of you I should choose. You two look so much the same, I don't know which one is which. I guess it doesn't matter! Eeny, Meeny Miny Moe! Aha...you will do! Come my child time to say goodbye!" She reached out to the little boy in the corner, who was squatting and crying out loud. "MOMMA....SHIV...BHAI!" As the woman dragged the other child out of the room, he stood there, shivering, scared, and unable to do anything. The last thing he saw was the desperate blue eyes of the little boy, as the room was succumbed by darkness once again,"Shrav! Where are you taking him? Come back...don't take him...Shrav! "