fifty-four

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⚠️ tw: talks of homophobia.

*two weeks later*

Wednesday.

"Maybe it'd be like a tea-party?" Pansy teased.

Laughing, I shook my head. "Ravenclaws aren't that bad at organizing parties. And the last one of the year? Not bad at all."

"That's true," Astoria agreed. "Remeber the lake party?"

"Last year? Yes," I remembered. "That was an interesting one. Too bad Pansy left by ten with the first desperate whore."

"She's no whore," Pansy bit.

I laughed. "Right. You are."

"True."

I laughed, just as we reached the Great hall. I excused myself to the bathroom, and they went in as I went to the nearest lavatories. The emptiest but nearest one.

Just when I entered the door, I heard light crying. It made me froze. I scanned the stall doors, seeing only four of the seven closed.

Gently I pushed the first open, but there was no one inside. I did the same with the second, and still nothing. Yet when I pushed the third open, I froze as I saw Mary on the floor beside the toilet.

Her eyes shot up to me, and immediately she pushed the tears from her cheeks, forcing away the crying, even though she failed.

"Hey," I said, still only looking down at her. "Are you okay?"

She gave a quick nod, making me frown.

"What's wrong?"

Then I saw tears form again. "I came out to my mum." And she cried again. "She doesn't approve."

I sighed, sinking down in front of her, placing my hand on her knee.

"Dorcas is mad because I'm not open at school yet, and Aria is avoiding me. Joe doesn't even speak to me, and Alex is being a douche lately. And you just left us!"

I sighed, placing my hand on her cheek, and she leaned into the touch.

"Dorcas doesn't understand how bloody hard it is. She's always been out, and it's easy for her. Everyone knows her as they lesbian Hufflepuff. It's harder for the 'straight' student. You know?"

I nodded, even though I didn't know what to say. Pansy had also always been out. Everyone has always just known. Same with Dorcas. And Enzo. It's known. But I understood in a way how it was hard for her. Everyone saw her as straight. And now that she knows she's not- it's all different and so many people won't accept it. Like her mother.

"Maybe I just- maybe I shouldn't even come out. Maybe I should just stay the way I was so that everything goes back to how it was. Normal."

"Life isn't supposed to stay the same," I said. "Some things change and sometimes people too."

She sighed. "Maybe I shouldn't."

I looked up, and out of the stall, my mind moving to Pansy and the others for a second.

They will be fine without me.

I closed the stall door, before sitting down across from Mary. At first she looked at me in confusion, but when I gave her a small smile, she seemed to set herself at ease.

"Now, why is Aria avoiding you?"

-----

It was already an hour after school had ended, and only then Mary and I left the lavatory.

She went to her common room, and I made my way to mine. Yet, I wasn't even down the stairs of the basement, before Mattheo shot to his feet after sitting on the lowest step.

"Where the fuck were you?"

"In the lavatory with Mary. She wasnt feeling well."

"Could've told someone. Pansy and Astoria said you were ganna be quick. It's been almost an hour!"

I stepped in front of him, looking up into his eyes, sighing. "I'm sorry, Mattheo. Can I just get a hug? It's been a long day."

Something in him calmed, and he placed his hands on my shoulders before pulling me to him. His arms wrapped around my shoulders as I tightened mine around his torso. I let out aan exhausted breath of air, sinking into his touch.

"Thank you," I sighed.

"Oh fuck off!"

I pulled back a bit, before looking up the staircase. I knew who said that. Pansy. Yet I didn't see her.

"Oh please," an unfamiliar voice mocked. "You're just a fag with clear mommy issues."

"The fuck," I bit, before rushing up the stairs with Mattheo following after me.

When I got to the top, I saw a sixth-year Slytherin whom I didn't know pinned to a wall with Pansy pinning her wand to his throat; yet he looked unfazed.

"Don't call me that."

He scoffed. "Then what do you want to be named? A whore?"

"Hey!" I yelled, making him look at me, but Pansy still glared at him. "What is your problem?!"

"I bet there's a spell that can fuck away the gay. Maybe then a guy would want to bone you."

"You-"

I watched as Pansy pressed the wand tighter against his throat, and he seemed to be struggling to breathe.

"Pansy, no," I said, pushing her away.

Her wand left his skin and he gasped for air.

"Yeah," he breathed. "Let your girlfriend save you."

And suddenly my fist flew across his face and he fell stumbling aside. Mattheo then grabbed him and shoved him against the wall.

"Fuck off, will you?"

He dropped him again, and the boy didn't hesitate to scurry. I looked at Pansy again, and to my surprise she was smiling.

"What?" I asked frowning.

She laughed. "Girlfriend."

I rolled my eyes, while having no choice but to smile as well.

"Idiot," I mumbled, making her laugh again.


[931 words]

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