He Lied | Harry Styles

05. Ian

With all the conversation that I've been with, this was the hardest. Why are you so curious, Darcy?
      "Can we go to the bwand's concert?"  She asked, her pleading eyes looking straight at mine.
      I gulped. Not because she's Fangirling over her father, but because of a question that was so unexpected. Seriously, how can a two-year-old girl think of that question? She's like a judge in a beauty pageant, so smart indeed.
       While processing the right words to say, a killer look from Merill gave me goosebumps. Totally weird.
       "Why don't you ask your mother, Darcy? She knows what's best for you," I said with a big teasing grin for Merill.
      "Mom, can I go to the concewt?" And there, I'm comfortable now, no intriguing question.
      Sighing, Merill lifted Darcy to her lap and started playing with her curls. "Do you want to go shopping?" asked Merill, changing the topic.
      "We can do that after the concewt, Mommy," said the daughter.
      Merill laughed and it took a long time for her to compose the best excuse. "First of all, you're too young. Second, it's too crowded and people might squeeze you there."
      Fingers crossed, eyes closed. I hope this will work.
      The talking stopped and a stare from Darcy hypnotized Merill, which is good. But I still need to teach Darcy how to control the Styles' charms.
      "But Uncle Ian can lift me so I can see those five boys," Darcy's angelic voice is equivalent to Piper McLean's charm speaking, and now I conclude, kids are smarter than adults.
      "Alright, Darcy," Merill sighed in defeat, a good sportsmanship, "But we need to go to the mall first since we don't have anything else to do here in the house."
      This will be my treat.

      My hands were inside my pocket while I walk behind these two girls in a boring expression. They're punishing me for leaving my credit card at home.
      "Mom, that's a beautiful doll!" said Darcy while leaving me behind and dragging Merill to the section where One Direction dolls are displayed. 
      "No, Darcy, that's a guy doll. We will find something different and more beautiful doll than that, okay?" Merill explained in a convincing way but it was still useless since Darcy was not listening to her. She's already playing with the Harry Styles doll.
      "How can a two-year-old girl get crazy over a teenage boy band while I'm here, hotter than those," I approached Merill, crossing my arms.
      "It's because she recognized her father, stupid!" she snapped, leaving me.
      "Hey! I'm just trying to make you smile!"
      I won't leave my credit card at home anymore. I can't freaking get what I want, I can't buy the latest album of The Wanted and I can't eat my favorite steak in my favorite restaurant. Oh, Merill, why are you so greedy?
      The long boring escapade almost lasted forever. I just hate seeing girls giving me that disgusting look look and asking for my number, one word to describe them, flirts. Seriously, I'm still not ready to mingle with those kind of girls. Anyway, this escapade might be boring but at least I'm happy to see my girls enjoying.

       After the girly adventure, Darcy's energy got used up until she was sleeping on my shoulder.
       Awkwardness filled in the car on our way home. Good thing I've got the guts to cut it off...
      "Better tell Darcy, than to hide it," I said after the long silence.
      But then she just ignored my presence. Alright, I'm just a ghost here talking about random things, invisible yet alive.
      "You can't hide it forever,"
      "I know,"
      "You can't hide it from Harry."
      "I know,"
      "You don't want Darcy to seek for a fatherly love her entire life."
      "I know."
      I'm pissed. What's with the "I know"? I've got long statements and she'll just answer me "I know". What the fuck?
      "I don't want Darcy to grow up without a father guiding her with me," she finally spoke.
      "Then stop hiding it from her! There's no point if you keep on--"
      "Because I don't want someone to take Darcy away from me, Ian," she said, softly.
      Scrunching my eyebrows, I asked her, "What? Who's going to let the both of you be far from each other?"
      She sighed heavily, "Harry is engaged to Annika. If Harry will know that we had a daughter, I'm sure he'll take Darcy and get to know her more. And of course with no doubt, Annika will be her step-mother. You already know that I hate Annika because of the things that she did to me."
      "No one will take Darcy away from you, Mims, as long as I'm alive." I said, glancing momentarily at her before fixing my gaze on the road again. At the corner of my eyes I can see her smile but a forced one. It's not the smile that I want to see.
      "You better remove that kind of thoughts. I know we can figure it out," I assured her as I stopped the car in front of their house.
      She gave me a slight nod and went ahead to the back seat. I immediately followed her and helped her with Darcy. Carefully, Merill settled Darcy comfortably in my arms and told me to bring her ahead to her room.
      I left her while she grabbed few of the shopping bags and made my way to Darcy's room. Fortunately, the slow tik-tak of my shoes didn't disturbed Darcy's sleep and before she can open her eyes and cry she was already placed in the soft bed of hers.
       I took a soft towel from her cabinet and washed it with soap and warm water, and used it to wipe her exhausted body. I also did brush her hair and changed her clothes. And maybe right now, I know what you're thinking. I will become a sweet father someday. I gave Darcy a soft good night kiss before turning off the light and made my way to my own room.
      I might be making a loud noise because I noticed that I was singing my favorite song, Baby by Justin Bieber. But then I realized its Selena's caller ring tone, she disappointed me.
      "Ian!" she yelled over the phone.
      "Hang on, Sel! You'll wake the monsters!" I snapped, making my voice steady.
      "I'm sorry, Ian, but this is just quick, it will not take an hour," she promised.
      "I hope so, Sel, because I hate talking to you. Just kidding,"
      "Stop it, Ian..."
      "Don't you ever lie to me, Sel. I know you still have these butterflies for me," I teased.
      "With all the information I've gathered from the past few years, I don't lie and will never lie. Yes, I still have butterflies for you, ugly butterflies. So, shut up and listen!"
      "Listening..."
      "I'm on my way there, specifically in Merill's flat, with newly cooked pizza. I can smell the cheese melting..."
      "Oh, my gods in Olympus, what came in to your mind to go here late at night?"
      "Son of Hephaestus, this is the daughter of Night, a vampire speaking. So, I'm gonna end this call now. See you later, bye."
      "Okay fine, Selena,"
       The beeping of the phone came out, telling me that the call ended. I eventually run to Merill who must be in her room at this moment. I knocked on the wooden door and waited for someone to answer.
      "Come in," a sweet tired voice of Merill finally came out.
      I twisted the door knob and take a step inside and found Merill rummaging her closet.
      "You're changing your clothes?" I asked awkwardly, slightly closing my eyes.
      "Nope, looking for something I can wear tomorrow. Oh, Ian, stop acting innocent, you are not," she said.
      "Fuck you, Merill! I haven't seen a girl naked all my life! My eyes are still innocent!" well, obviously, it's true.
      And as what I have expected, she laughed at me. I did the right thing, I told her the truth. I haven't really seen a nude girl, except on magazines, in person, it's horrible, might be sexy, but it makes me burst out a lot of sperms. Shit! Did I just say that?
      "I won't argue with you, Yan, I've seen lots of porn videos in your phone when we were in high school. You're eyes are definitely innocent!" she winked, placing the clothes on her bed with her newly bought sandals.
      "You're totally cruel! Hell! I did put passwords there! How did you open it? Fuck!" I said in range. I can't believe she saw it!
      "I'm a good hacker, innocent guy," she tapped my shoulders, teasingly.
      I closed my eyes, trying to control the guilt and pleasure towards those sexual things. And then I remembered I'm here not to talk about the videos inside my phone before.
      "Alright, Merill, I didn't actually came here to push the topic about my innocent eyes, but because Selena called me earlier that she's coming here with a newly cooked pizza," I stated.
      "That's good, I'm still hungry," she said, rubbing her stomach.
      "Obviously, you don't like cheap restaurants, my fault that I left my credit card," I sighed, "I'll be in my room resting, call me if Selena arrives,"
       "Oh, shut up! We'll have the party in your room," she laughed and pushed me outside her room before slamming the door.
       And that's it, party with the girls again.

      Crossed-legs, Pizza and a Scrabble board between us three. Just like the old times, enjoying every second we have as a group of weirdos.
      We enjoyed the night. Gossips, Fangirling, love life until the topic ended up between Merill and Harry.
      After the explaining scene of Merill, that made us all awestruck, the air felt different. Well, I'm gonna share to you that every time Merill explains a certain topic, she explains it with full emotion, complete feelings and drama.
      "But anyway, I'm happy for the both of them being engaged," Merill stated, ending her explanation with a statement that is a lie.
      Selena and I shared awkward gazes. Raising our eyebrow to Merill, we both laughed in unison.
      "C'mon, guys, it's been two years. Let's move on, I'm happy that I have Darcy in my life," she continued, acting that she's not affected.
      "Merill, Harry is still Darcy's father. There's no moving on in that stage! You know how it will affect Darcy someday," Selena said.
     "I know! When these certain day comes, I'll tell Darcy that her father is a member of a famous British-Irish boy band named One Direction. And he'll look for her father and Harry is just like 'I don't have a daughter!'" Merill explained, looking so stressful about it.
      "That was funny," Selena commented, poker-faced.
      "I can't imagine Harry doing that, he sounds gay," I added.
      "He always sounds gay to you, Ian," Selena and Merill both said in unison.
      So, they think Harry's hot. I absolutely think that he's gay, and was confirmed when he broke Merill's heart. He didn't know how fragile Merill is, maybe not until I punch his gay face and kick his gay ass.
      Merill doesn't deserve a gay-guy like him. She deserves someone better, someone who can protect her, who can make her happy, who can accept Darcy and her and forget about their past, someone who will never leave her broken, I need to find that someone or maybe that someone is just here, maybe it's just me. Am I right?
      Oh, what am I thinking? I shouldn't be thinking about that.
      "Do you think it's time for me to go home?" Selena interrupted my thoughts. Should I thank her?
      I waited for Merill to answer Selena's question but I think she's also waiting for me to answer Selena's question. That's too much to repeat.
      "Well, Selena, it's almost midnight and it's very harmful for a pretty lady like you to drive late at night. So, for me, you better go to the safe road, and that's going home as early as now," I said, a little bit caring to my best friend.
       "That's sweet, Ian, Selena appreciated it," Merill said, frustrated.
      Merill and I joined Selena for a short walk from the room, to the hall way, to the stairs, to the living room, to the gate and to where Selena parked her car.
       "This is a wonderful night, guys," Selena said.
       "Honestly, I did enjoy a little bit, especially when you started blabbering about Union J. I appreciated it a lot," I tapped Selena's head like she's my pet and I annoy her when I do that, which is sweet.
       "Don't mind that asshole, Sel," Merill spoke up behind me.
       Selena smiled, "Good bye, guys. Have a lovely night," she said before opening the door of her car.
       We all sent our good byes and take cares to her when she made a last glance to me and pulled me by my sleeve and kissed me. The most passionate kiss I ever had, the softest lips I've ever pressed on. Then I heard a giggle behind, we just forgot everything about Merill.
       "Good bye, Ian," she whispered and entered her car.
      "Take care," I said softly, still stunned about what happened. A girl kissed me and it felt different. I don't know, I'm insane!
      She didn't looked at me after that, she started the engine and drive off like nothing happened.
       "Gosh, Ian, you better make the first move and not act like you're the female over here," Merill laughed, with her arms crossed.
       "I'm a male, definitely a male, Merill. I love girls not guys, I'm not gay!" I stated.
       "I'm not trying to say that you're gay. What I mean is, try to ask Selena out and have a date, be her suitor!"
       Ask Selena out? Is it right if I have feelings for you?
       "I don't know, Mims," I said, feeling empty.
       "Selena loves you, Ian. Why don't you love her back? You two are perfect for each other," Merill said, smirking.
       It hurts when you hear these words from the one you love. Pushing you to love another girl you don't really love.
       "I can't answer that question yet," I whispered.
       And she just shrugged made her way inside leaving me outside thinking about her. If I can just confess to her that I love her more than anything.

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 cynthnie.x