Best friends, and THAT'S all... ♡Eddie munson♡

Strangers in aisle 2.

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9908 words <3.

⚠️ Suicid3 & drug talk.

168 hours, 684,688 seconds, 11,412 minutes or short... 1 full week you and Eddie haven't spoke since the fight. 1 week that has felt like months, it doesn't seem that long for some but to you it was, you've seen each other practically every day since childhood and it was painful,
you'd be lying if you said you haven't missed hearing his voice or seeing his face and his dark brown chocolate button eyes.

Sleeping hasn't been great, you feel like absolute hell. But you've not taken anything since the argument.
Depression has been hitting harder each day that's gone by without Eddie, you struggle getting out of bed most of the time when you didn't have work that is, which gave you something to do for a few hours but you couldn't help but want your shift to be over so you could walk home and go right back to laying in bed, just laying awake staring out of your window like you are now, zoning out into your thoughts which were all about how you could've prevented this all from happening if you just put your journal away.

You saw him once this whole week, at the gas station one night,you dragged yourself out to buy what little food you've been eating, when you did eat it was mostly picking at stuff, snacks like chips or crackers. You looked up and saw him looking over at you, in that moment you wanted to run up to him and wrap yourself around him, to say his name out loud and have him hold you back and forget the fight,
but all you were thinking about while you look over at him was what he said about you not being here right now,which made you feel alien to him, it felt like he was looking over in your direction like he saw something but he wasn't sure what,

as if something quickly past his eye but when he looked over it was gone...like you were invisible.
He didn't wave and neither did you, not even "Hi", you felt like strangers, and not like inseparable childhood best friends which hurt you, so you walked away quickly grabbing a bag of chips without even looking at what flavour and went to pay,Feeling heavily sick on the walk home but almost debating going back to say something even if he ignored you, but ultimately deciding against it.
Seeing him for those few seconds was the only time you had this week.

Your mom noticed Eddie being distant, obviously, he's always over your place and him not showing up for a full week was very noticeable. She asked about it but you just said he was busy with more hours at work, saving up for the apartment that you don't even think is happening anymore, but your mom doesn't know that.
You told her you see eachother it's just not as often because of work and more hours to save faster, she seemed to buy it.
You've not spoken to anyone, not properly, not even a full conversation with Steve or Robin at work, it wasn't anything personal towards them you just feel drained and tired, 3 hours of sleep a night you were getting if not less, and a couple days this week you pulled all nighters again.

Steves told you to go home and rest several times but you always seem to persuade him that being at family video and working was the only thing that seemed to take your mind off things, which...wasn't all true, it was blocking out things for a while yes, but it all comes back once your at home and in bed.
It feels like every minute that goes by you wonder how he's doing, if he's ok, if he misses you like you miss him.
But then you go back to the night at the gas station, seeing him but not helping feeling like you were strangers because neither of you said a word and it felt as if he was looking right through you.

----EDDIE'S POV----

All I've been thinking about was that night, everything I said and everything YN said, how I left things and walked out on her, I fucked up and I own up to that. We both said things we didn't mean, I was hurt and angry, scared that if she's doing those things and has been for a while I'll find her one day...and I won't be able to bring her back this time, it scared the hell out of me and still does.
But I know she's hurting also, more now because of how I acted out of fear of losing her to suicide, I don't want to find her like that. I know I reacted in the wrong way, said some really stupid fucking things that even hurt me to say, it broke me seeing the looks on her face,seeing her cry.