⚠Smutty on 1st page & dotted throughout,warnings before hand on those chapters⚠
~:°~When THOSE types of dreams start becoming more frequent, will YN manage to keep the fast growing feelings inside that continue towards her over protective, childhoo...
"Best friends and THAT really is all" Was a FAKE ending, for those of you who don't understand why YN can't tell anyone, who don't understand the plot, a look into what would possibly happen if she was to tell. And for those who keep telling me how to write, and keep telling me she needs to tell Eddie etc. -- As it was a FAKE chapter, those things DIDN'T REALLY HAPPEN. Eddie is ALIVE, he DOES NOT know about Billy's blackmailing. And YN HASN'T asked Eddie to make things official, their NOT bf gf. --
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⚠️ Depression, Anxiety, Thoughts of abusing drugs to cope, Illusions to previous SA.
4800 words<3
// 8th January, 2 weeks since christmas, since IT happened.
It feels like the walls are closing in on me again but faster, faster than the first time it started happening with him.
'I guess we'll just have to wait for next time...' 'I guess we'll just have to wait for next time...' 'I guess we'll just have to wait for next time...'
Hasn't stopped repeating in my head since that day, always in his voice. I'm even scared to be left alone in my own aparmtnet when Eddie goes to work and I have days off.. I can't keep going to work with him, I don't want to be a burden and be around all the time when he's busy, he sees me everyday but what if he starts getting tired of all that because I keep going to work with him..? What if he gets tired of having me around all the time...? All because I'm affraid to be left alone, affraid to even leave the apartment, I can't even go to the gas station to grab snacks anymore. I can't even bring myself to go into work today because I'm affraid, affraid if I run into him, Billy. My thoughts remain under a lock with no key... //
The thoughts you were writing down in your diary, the one Eddie got you for Christmas, gets cut short by him walking into the bedroom and standing in the doorway. He was getting ready for work, though, he didn't want to go anymore after you told him you called in sick with a migraine, which...wasn't true.
"You sure you don't want me to stay with you...? I can call in sick.." He pouts at you sitting in bed with your back against the headboard, his arms folded across his chest as he lent against the door frame.
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You just shake your head with a small smile. "I'm sure Eddie it's okay... I don't want you missing shifts okay? I'm just gonna try and sleep whatever this is off." You reply laying your pen down between the pages of your diary. "Mmm..just a migraine right? You don't feel sick? If you feel sick I'm staying home, I'll do extra time on Tuesday to make up for calling in" Leaning off the door frame and putting his hands into his back pockets. "Mhmm, just a migraine... really I'm okay, I promise." He raises an eyebrow and then nods a bit defeated knowing he won't win the argument here, making his way over to give you a kiss on the head and then on the lips. You closed your diary up as he made his way over.
