At that moment, I knew my answer but something was stopping me from saying my answer out loud.
In my head, I used to imagine him kissing me like tommorow was never going to come. It was like a way of him to mark me as his and to remind me that he'll never let me go. I don't know why I can't say yes to him right now. I've said so many times in my mind but I guess..... reality and dreams are two different things.
Dreams let you be free while reality is the complete opposite.
"I-I'm sorry", I whispered and stood up.
"Why?", he ask.
"If I knew why, I would've told you the reason", I said sadly and walked off, leaving him all alone there. Just like how I left Viraj anna with my appa instead of being there with my anna.
"ANNA!", I yelled as I watched him, limping to my room.
"I-I'm f-f-fine, R-Radha", he said with a fake smile plastered on his face. I was horrified by how most of his skin were completely red from the beatings he's got. It's all because I left the house to play with the kids at the playground. It's all my fault. I caused this.
"I'm sorry, anna!", I screamed from the top of my lungs and cried to him. My chest was pain and my heart couldn't calm down. I should've never left my brother with an abusive man. What was I fucking thinking?!
"I-It's not y-your fault, Radha", he said and slowly sat on the bed beside me.
"Nothing has ever been your fault", he whispered in my ear. Not even a few minutes later, Viraj anna had passed out without me knowing.
"A-anna?", I called out.
"VIRAJ!", I yelled but no response. Panicked and scared for him, I dialed 999 for help.
"Hello, this is 999. What's your emergency?" the caller from the other end asked.
"My brother has passed out from abusive b-beatings", I said. "Please hurry", I pleaded.
"Just stop already!", I mumbled and closed my ears. The flashback which replayed in my mind brought tears down my cheeks. I tried to be strong but it only led me to being more broken. Goddamn it.
Make it stop, make it stop, make it stop!
"Radha, are you crying?", I heard Lashven ask me from behind. I need to hide.
"You sound hurt".
"No, I don't", I answered and turned to look at him. "Even if I was hurt, why are you concerned about it?", I ask with a frown.
"Because I care about you", he said in a serious way.
"How much?".
"What?".
"How much do you care, Lashven?", I questioned him. "Is it enough that you'll accept me for who I am?", I sighed.
"I don't think so", I said sadly before walking back to my friends. Lashven followed me as he was heading there as well.
"Why are you making conclusions of what I think by yourself?", he asked and that made stop in my tracks.
"Are you ready to listen to my side of the story?", he asked. I was about to answer but again something was stopping me. So, I silenced myself.
"Yeah, I don't think so", he told me then walked in a faster pace to our group of friends.
That question made me wonder. Do I really make a conclusion for others by myself?
I shook my head and continued walking to my friends. I thought the walk would help my mind to be fresh but the question still lingered in my head.
When I reached my friends, Katherine was kissing Jackson and making him flustered while Githa sat on Viraj anna's lap and listened to the stories of the pretty tattoos he has on his body.
"Ugh! I'm bored!", Katherine whined to everyone. Wasn't she just making love to Jackson?
"Am I invisible to you, babe?", Jackson asked, slightly angry with her. Katherine ignored him and whined again to everyone else about how bored she is.
"How about we play Truth or Dare?", Githa asked, earning a glare from my bestie.
"Are we five-year-old kids, Githa?", Katherine asked and rolled her eyes.
"Well, you sure are acting like one with your stupid childish whines", Githa responded back.
"Why don't we play a game where if one's phone receives a notification, they'd have to kiss the person on their right and go on a short walk with them?", my brother suggested.
"Now, that's what I call fun!", Katherine said. "Everyone, put your phone in the middle and sit in a circle", she continued.
"We all did as told by Katerine. In the small circle we made, Jackson is on my rightand Lashven is on my left. I avoided looking at Lashven at all costs and trained my eyes on all of our phones.
I couldn't look at him.
Whenever I looked at him, his words would ring in my ears and make me think about an answer for the question he had asked me not so long ago.
Are you ready to listen to my side of the story?
Suddenly, Githa yelled and that's what pulled me back to reality.
"SOMEONE'S GOT A NOTIFICATION! EEEEEEKKKK!", she screamed excitedly. I bend forward to see who's phone it was and my eyes widen when realization hit me hard.
"Who's phone is that?", Jackson asks. I gulped before answering.
"It's m-mine", I said and hung my head low, feeling too nervous.
"Okay let's get this over with them", Jackson shrugged and came closer to me.
I froze in my spot out of shock. Is he really going to kiss me? Am I going to seriously lose my first kiss to my best friend's boyfriend? Feeling too uncomfortable, my body slowly leaned backwards and accidentally bumped into Lashven.
When Jackson was too close to my lips, I turned my head away and shut my eyes tightly. Right then, I felt someone's lips on mine. I wanted to escape the kiss but the person I'm kissing doesn't let me go and the kisses turned from gentle to rough. The kisses were starting to turn me on without a doubt but this is so wrong of me because I am kissing Katherine's boyfriend!
His kisses didn't stop and I was craving for more. I moaned out loud when he bit my lips and left the delicious taste of him in my mouth with just one long kiss. I opened my eyes and that's when I realized that person who kissed me wasn't wasn't Jackson, it was....
"L-Lashven", I say, breathlessly.
"I told you I'd be your first kiss, Radha", he whispered and tucked a strand of my hair behind my ear.
Everyone else were cheering and clapping for us in the background. A small amount of blush crept up to my cheeks, resulting in me being shy.
"Let's go for that walk now", Lashven said and extended his hand out for me. I took his hand and smiled at him. It's not a dream anymore.
Lashven Krishav is truly my first kiss. Like he said before, it's a kiss which will make me crave for more. No joke.
♡♡♡♡♡
"Why do you do that?", I ask as the both of us walked side by side through the dark night. The lamps were the only ones that helped to brighten up the place.
"Do what?".
"Chase me for answers and try to figure out about me", I said. "It's......tiring", I sighed.
"Because I want to know about you more", he answered. He grabbed my hand and held it with his. I send him a glare and huffed out out of annoyance.
"You are impossible", I scoffed. He shook his head at me and chuckled.
"You've got it all mixed up, Radha", he said. "Impossible is your middle name not mine", he smiled and kissed the back of my hand like a gentleman would.
YOU ARE READING
Twinkling Firelight ᴿᴸᵛ
RomanceEvery year, Radha Aashi Kavya and her family would celebrate Deepavali at their house with a few friends and close relatives. This year, Radha's father decided that they'll be celebrating Deepavali with a distant relative. Radha's father said that i...
