48. He/Hard

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Ryan Damison

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Ryan Damison

~Flashback~

*Gnk*
*Gnk*

I look at him and chug the glass of beer. Gulp by gulp, the liquid goes inside of me, numbing my senses to the carefree dick I am.

*Thud*

We both slam our empty mugs at the same time and burp out loud. "Let's get this fucking game on!" Dakota growls, licking the froth mustache off his lips.

"Fuck, yeah! It's Pick-up-line night." I howl, taking up the self-made challenge. Blood pumps up to my head, and I adjust it in my pants. I am too excited!

We order four more drinks before, as the rule of the game. After getting full high and tight, so much that I don't remember my wedding date or that I was never married, we get down to the floor to find pussies for us.

Music bang loudly in my ears and my knees sway to the beat as we look around the dance floor for some hot chicks.

"What about that girl?" I point at the fake blondie with a butterfly tattoo on her shoulder.

"She will work." Dakota walks up to her with a smirk, and I follow behind him with my glass. "Aye girl, you are so my type. You know why? You look like how Mia Khalifa sounds. Horny."

"Fuck off!" She scowls at him like an agitated Karen.

I spit in my glass and laugh out loud behind him. Dakota shrugs his shoulders as the girl walks away saying more curse words. "She looked ugly anyway, your turn."

I gulp the liquor down and look around until my eyes fall on a girl with yellow, pink, and blue hair with denim shorts. Perfect!

Dakota follows me as I walk up to her and give her a privilege to hear one of my greatest pickup line, "Hey girl. It's so cold outside. Can I come inside of you?"

Her pink eyebrows raises up as she says, "Excuse me. My pronouns are they/them."

"The fuck?" Dakota asks from beside me with the same expression as mine.

"I do not identify myself as she/her or he/his, but as them/they/theirs. It's called gender neutral pronouns." She explains to our dumb drunk asses.

"Dammit, woman! Pick one!" I growl in frustration. So I know which pickup line to use at her. Or them. Fuck!

"I told you idiots, its them/they." She says throwing her yellow-pink-blue back.

"Fine, them/they. Would you like to suck my he/hard dick?"

Her hand raises at a speed that I couldn't detect and lands right on my left cheek. "Jerks."

That/bitch slapped me/I.

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