Pregnancy Wishes

Breathe

Sunny's POV

I was with my dad walking Queenie after school. Kiran and my friends walked me home. My dad knew something was wrong so he told me to go for a walk with him. My dad was a life saver because I needed a reminder to process what had happened.

I didn't understand how CPR was cheating. I think that it would be a good thing. I knew that to me since I was out it wasn't mouth to mouth. It was just plain old CPR. I mean it was Kiran but why did that matter. I could have been dead right now. I was frustrated before and now I just feel worse.

I thought he would be happy that I was saved but I was mistaken. I really did love Joseph too. I was the mom of the group and I tried so much to have him be with me. I should have known that he wouldn't want the same things as me. How could I have known that though. I just wanted to.

As I was walking beside my dad I kicked a rock. "What's wrong" he asked me. "I think it's over between me and Joseph" I said with my head down. I knew I had the biggest frown on my face. I had tears in my eyes that I was holding in. "Why" he asked me softly. He knew it was a touchy subject.

"I think I saw Joseph's true colors" I said as I kept my head down. "What did he do" said my dad. "He got into a fight and blamed me for something that wasn't my fault" I said trembling. I knew I was wanting to whimper from what had happened.

My bottom lip was shaking. I wasn't okay with what happened. "We'll just because he got mad once doesn't mean those are his true colors" my dad said as he put his hand on my back. I held even tighter to Queenie's leash. "Still" I said knowing that he is probably right. I can't judge him harshly enough.

"If he is like that for other reasons then those are his true colors" my dad stated. I looked up at him not knowing what to say. To think of it Joseph was a control freak. He never let me do what I wanted. He would stop me from being myself. I always put him first in our relationship. How could I do that.

I looked back at the ground. "Come on" my dad said with a light smile. I followed him down the pathway. We both stopped at a ice cream truck. "Mango and coconut flavored" asked my dad. He knew my answer so I just nodded my head. He went to go pay as I looked down at Queenie beside me.

Queenie wagged her tail at me. I smiled down at her as she looked up at me. I took her to the grass and I let her run free. She is an amazing trained dog. I took off running and she chased me. We played at least two games before my dad came back with ice cream. I called Queenie and she sat beside us.

We sat down at a bench to eat our ice cream. I got my favorite flavors well my dad got his favorite. His was orange which tasted good. It still won't ever compare to mango and coconut though. We both sat in silence while we ate our ice cream. "You know if it makes it easier don't try to push for answers" my dad said. I knew he was talking about the stuff before.

"Why" I asked him completely confused. I needed answers. I needed to know that wasn't the Joseph I fell in love with. I needed to know how he feels. I needed to know if we should even be together. There was a lot to know but so little time. "The more you rush the more things will get worse" he said.

"Boys will get angry and blame you before they blame themselves even when it is his fault. Guys don't try to apologize when they are pissed off. Guys are stupid and we all know that but we have to become mature to see that" my dad said. I think he was telling me the whole truth about how guys are.

"They do want stuff to be easy and they need things to go their way if not it is complicated and stupid" my dad said as he went on. "A guy will call a mature woman a child when he feels bossed around" my dad said with a light laugh. "Guys are idiots" he said as he looked down at me. "I may not know the situation between you and Joseph but that's something to think about" my dad said as he looked away from me.

"Do you think he changed because of me" I asked. "If he was quiet then maybe he couldn't force himself to be what you wanted and he got angry. He may have liked you but he never loved you to go with the flow. Joseph would have made a effort and made it work just to see you smile. He shouldn't have tried to control who you are when you put too much" he said.

"Joseph just saw the bad and he exploded with frustration. A boy does that when he can't speak his mind. Never let a guy tell you differently" my dad said. I looked up at him listening to his every advice. I needed to hear it for myself. I knew my dad was going to be the person of reason. "I will still stuck up for all men but most boys have to grow up" my dad said jokingly. I couldn't help but laugh too.

"Thank you" I said as I hugged him tightly. "What for I am pretty sure I insulted every guy in your grade and younger. Maybe even your whole male generation" my dad said plainly as he thought about it. "It doesn't matter" I said as I truly thought about the advice he told me. I wished I would have heard it sooner. This was all I needed.