Alliania

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Anaisarwen Isla

I solemnly touch her diary. Do I have the right to read it?

Kakayanin ko ba?

But I want to ķnow what my mother's feelings and experiences through her life. Is it possible? Or I seems to be disrespecting her privacy?

Mom, I apologize for my curiosity. I felt like I need to read this.

I nervously open the book. Nalulumbay akong napangiti my mother's clean, organize, and beautiful handwritten greeted my sight.

Binuklat ko muli ito, I thinl this diary was with mymother eversince she was a child according to the first date she wrote on this. I assumed that, she just put Emperor's surname after she got married.

I smiled scanning and reading through it, nakasaad dito ang mga nangyayari sa buhay niya no'ng bata pa lang siya. Her penmanship at that age is exceptional.

I also read how Uncle Dad and Grandpapa are to her, kung gaano niya kamahal ang dalawa at ganoon din siya.

Until...

I reached where she first met the man she'll end up marrying in the future, our Father, The not Emperor pa dito.

She notice his potential and cheered him on. I was.. stunned on the way she describe the Emperor here.

Mom, don't you realize you're already captivated by him the first time you've met him?

She didn't put that he likes him, nor what she felt but the way she contruct her words, mahahalata na she was fixated on him.

'Today, My Papa introduce to us Prince Dustin Thelonious and he will be his student from this day onwards. The Prince is wise, gentle, and was eager to learn from Papa. He was nice too! He let me call him brother since my Brother said, he was part of the family and always wanted siblings.'

'Brother Thelo is a kind brother and man, I desire the finest and preeminest future he can reach. I'll always root for him and cheer him on.'

'Brother is always making a fuss about everything and there is Brother Thelo as always, making sure that my dearest brother won't be upset. They're veing a good dynamic, I wish they stay together like that and protect each other.'

'My Papa was proud to Brother and Brother Thelo, he was smiling like a cute bear. Ops. However, he still didn't let them off the hook for that day, my poor boys.'

"Brother Thelo was very serious today, Papa was being kinda mean on his lectures. I was even uneasy that I grabbed tightly the arms chair while watching them. Brother Thelo, you can do it! You're going to be a dignified and resplendent Emperor to this Empire."

'I'm sure Brother will get mad when he knows that I sneaked out last night with Brother Thelo. Why? Because he didn't let me even when it's our Estate's founding anniversary, so Brother Thelo did the deed and I guess that's one of the greatest day I've ever had. I've got to eat, dance with him on the streets, watch people laughing and enjoying the joyous day. That's so much fun!"

Althoug her letters are short and witty, she still displays her formality and elagance through her writing.

And, after nitong masayang pagkukwneto niya, it just drop.

'Alliania, my friend, my personal maid will be back again after so many years- week, after a week I meant. I missed her so much! I look forward seeing her again I've got so many things to tell her and to do with her.'

'I've been sick, I'll always said to them that I'm busy studying that I cannot always be with them like in the past. I don't wanna bother them when Brother Thelo's training were going harsh and hard.'

'I'm so happy that Alliania was there for me! Although I can't also say to her what I'm feeling.'

'Ohh! Brother Thelo is so considerate and kind to Alliana, I'm glad! Since Alliana's been a good friend of mine.'

'Hays, Brother Thelo must've been upset. I mean, I was even shock that of all people, Papa, wanted to arrange marriage us. I get that Brother is totally good, extremely too good to be true for me. I don't think, it will that bad... but his reaction hurts me. Does he dislike justthe thought of being my husband?'

'I've heard Brother and Brother Thelo was arguing, it's the first time. And I've heard that, he likes someone else so he can't marry me. Even if he won't be the Emperor, or even if he has to give up the throne, he'll still want to be with the person he loves."

May kumirot sa puso ko, she was inlove with him unknowingly and she was already hurting.

'I.. was supposed to confessed to him but,I guess I still got no luck. Brother Thelo, was not even there when I won my first fencing match title when he said in the past, he will be there when I won or lost. But he's not here, even the sight of the strand of his golden hair and shadow.'

'I was dejected when they push through our engagement, our arrange marriage. Brother Thelo.. was not the same anymore with me. That's what I cannot. I was the one to blame. If it wasn't because of that, nothing will change and none of this will happen.'

'I'm so so sorry, Brother Thelo. I did my best to oppose this marriage but Papa won't yield, even Brother. I'm so much sorry about this.'

'I'm sorry, Alliania and Brother Thelo."

"As much as they love each other, I was the thorn in their love. If it wasn't because of me, our responsibility, this won't happen.'

'I was the witness now of their love and devotion to each other. And yet, I was the one ruined it. I ruined the love story of my dear friend and dear brother. How horrible am I?'

Napatigil ako at napatulala. Mother...why..? Why are you the one fixing it? You did nothing wrong, you just felt it but you did nothing!

'Alliania, why did you have to leave? I.. I was willing to cast away everything for the happiness for the both of you. I was willing to stop everything. Why did you give up on Brother Thelo? He was devastated and lost. Please come back... he needs you and he loves you.'

What? Alliana?

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