COTE: Mysterious Siblings(DISCONTINUED)

Volume 7.5: Bejeweled and Beloved

Ayanokouji Kiyotaka's Closest Confidant

Ayanokouji POV

"I'm here, so what did you want to talk about?" 

Toma-kun had told me to meet him in front of the dorms on the morning of December 24th. He was standing there, still having his arm sling while looking up towards the sky. 

"We'll talk while we walk. There's a smaller scale cafe than Pallet that serves pretty good coffee, let's head there." He said, walking to the direction of the mall. 

Having no choice but to follow suite, I closely observed how his demeanor was a bit dark today. Not that he wasn't usually like that, it was that it was darker than his normal. Perhaps it had to do something with that girl from yesterday? 

"Did she really hit you that hard with whatever she told you?" I asked. 

"Who? Tokunaga's daughter?" 

"Yes." 

"It wasn't the question that bothered me. Actually, what she asked was a pretty normal question that I kept on asking myself back then. This time though, the problem was that Shizuko was there to listen to my answer, and you were there to witness it." 

"What's so wrong with me being a witness?" 

"This is a family matter. Back when we were still living at our house, Shizuko and I would argue about it, the mortality I mean. The end that I seek isn't the end that she or any of the alters would want." 

"So what is this end that you seek then? Is it a painful death without anyone noticing? An end where everyone forgets about you?" 

"Huh?"

My remark made him stop in his tracks, it got him interested. 

"An end doesn't necessarily mean one's death. You could be alive, but no one cares about you. You could be bedridden, but no one wants to take care of you. I'm asking what kind of end does the person Toma Hisoka wants for himself." 

This man doesn't understand that the value he imposes upon people is high. Or rather, he does understand, but he is denying that fact. Either way, it always seemed to me that all he wanted was a peaceful life, like I did. That was why he and his sister came to this school, to seek asylum from the outside world, at least for a while. 

Once our three years are over, everyone will go back to where they came from, including myself. If the environment that these two have been in was dangerous, then choosing this school was their best move to make. People like Ryuuen having been in his area sounded like a lot of trouble for two kids living without their guardians. On top of that, all of the domestic issues that they'd have to take care of, and Toma-kun faced it without wanting to consult his little sister. He's a jack of all trades, master of none, if you will.

"Well, if you put it like that, I guess I just don't think I have a place in this world. The question that girl asked really got me thinking again, about what it would feel like living without any purpose. It's the only 'if' scenario that I keep on looking into." 

"And your purpose is to continue in taking care of Toma-san?" 

"Yes, and should they no longer need me, I suppose that's fine. Besides, she has surpassed me in most aspects. All she needs now is the experience of having to work actual jobs and I can finally disappear." 

"I don't think that's true." 

Toma-kun slowly turned around. 

"Even though it looks like neither of us understand it much, but human emotion is one of the things that drive us to strive for better. You, as her brother, have been a big influence on her, and as such you are her biggest source of moral support. Should she lose you, I doubt things would go well."