Fields of Lavenders

7

"Ms Ysabelle-"

"Ara, I'm sorry okay? I'm sorry for what I said. I really am." She said, not letting go of the hug.

Ending, I reciprocated the hug. Caressing her back in hopes that she calms down.

"Ms, It's okay. Let go na po." I said when I started feeling uncomfortable.

She did as I say so and hold up a bag of food, "have you eaten?" She asked.

I look down, "Pakain pa lang po." I honestly answered.

"Well then have it with me," she smiled and entered my condo as if pagmamay-ari nya ito.

Well, she used to live here.

I closed the door, still shocked she's here.

"I know the moment you walked out of the restaurant that you want to go to your condo, and that you still haven't eaten. Kaya I ordered foods for the both of us." She said habang nilalatag nya ang mga pagkain.

"Pero diba kumain na po kayo?" Tanong ko.

"No, I canceled my order as well then went to the nearest McDonald's branch." She said.

"But-"

"No but's lavelle, eat." Utos nya saakin.

Why are you doing this?

Since I really am hungry, I decided to save the questions for later. I grabbed a plate and decided to eat with her, she does the same as well. Walang nagsasalita, no one even dared to open up a topic. We were just both quiet, quietly eating. Scared to destroy the moment. When we finished, niligpit ko nalang ang mga pinagkainan namin. But both of us still didn't want to talk, and I'm already bored by the silence.

"Miss," I call.

"Hmm?" She hums in response.

"Why are you doing this?" I asked.

"What?" She asked.

"This, looking after me again, buying me food, eating with me, hiring me as the architect of your house, coming back..." I whispered the last word as if I don't want her to hear that, even though I know she can.

She looks at me and smiled bitterly. "I used to be your teacher Ara, your just like my child na. Of course I would take care of you, just like every teacher would do."

Teacher, hanggang teacher and student nalang kami talaga.

"But you've already done that, your teacher card has already expired. Along time ago." I said, trying to hold myself back.

"I care for you, as you used to be my student. Caring isn't something that expires, It's what a decent human being does." She said, using my own words against me.

"Do you care for your other students as well just like how you do to me?" I question.

"Yes," she answered.

"Do you love them the same as you love me?" I asked again.

She pause for a moment, not being able to answer.

I scoffed. "You don't, because you used view me as something else. Not just a student." I said.

"Ara please-"

"You come back after eight years, eight years." I emphasized. "And now you want me to be the Architect of your damn house? For what? For me to see you with someone? Someone who's now making your heart happy?" I question.

"Ara-"

"Do you know how that affects me? I can't even go to work anymore, I prefer staying here. Because it's the only place I'm sure you wouldn't be. But here you are, stepping foot again after eight years acting like you didn't hurt me." I said, not being able to hold the tears back anymore.

"Ara, It's not my intention to-"

"Of course it isn't, you've already said that." I said, looking away from her.

"I want to take care of you!" She yelled. "Even if I have someone new now, I still want to take care of you. Make sure you eat, make sure you go to sleep on the right time, make sure your okay. I want to do all of that, even if we're not together anymore. It has become my responsibility to do so. And I know you will say that it isn't, but that's how I feel Ara."

I can't help myself, tears are flowing like a river and I couldn't even say anything to what she said.

It's still too painful for me.

"I can, and have been able to do so over the past 8 years. So please, just don't." I say, which felt like knives hitting my chest.

"Don't, don't come back again. Don't show up again. Don't, please. Just leave." I beg.

She smiled bitterly and gathered her things, a sign that she's ready to leave. But before she does so, she yelled words that I wouldn't be able to forget.

"No Ara. It may sound selfish, but no. I won't stop. Until you slowly get used to it. I won't give up, just like how you did with me."

When she closed the door, I found myself laying on the floor. Crying heavily. Crying my emotions for the past 8 years.

Crying all the tears I wasn't or haven't been able to cry.

Suddenly my phone rang, but I was too busy crying to pick it up. And it kept on ringing, many times. However my energy is still too low to even stand up.

I was just crying, In one corner. Hoping that when I cry all my feelings out. It would just go away.

Hoping it would end.

Suddenly, I heard someone coming in. I didn't bother checking kung sino. Until I saw someone who's wearing a black hoodie and sweat pants with matching cap.

"Anong nangyari sa'yo?" Bungad nya saakin.

"J-Jia..." I utter.

She shook her head and went down to my level, wiping my tears with her hands.

"At sino naman ang nagpaiyak sayo ha?" She asked, ready to fight.

"Sya Jia, sya lang naman ang nakakapag-paiyak saakin nang ganto." I cried even harder.

She sighed heavily and grabbed a box of tissues and handed them to me, allowing me to wipe my tears with them as she fix my hair.

"Bat ka nandito?" Tanong ko after maka recover.

"Tinatawagan kita, hindi ka naman sumasagot. Eh hindi ka naman ganon, kaya nagalala ako. Baka kung anong kalokohan ang gawin mo." She said. "Tama nga ako."

"After eight years, bumalik sya. Tapos kinuha pa nya akong architect ng bahay nila. Ang sakit Jia." Pagrarant ko. "Bakit pa? Para saan pa? Para ipamukha nya saakin na may iba na sya?" I question.

"Bat mo tinanggap?" Tanong nya.

"That's what professional architects do." Simple kong sagot.

"Yun naman pala eh, alam ko na may feelings ka parin sa kanya. Pero kahit masakit, wala na eh. Wala na kayo ara. At wala nang pagasa pa lalo na't may bago na syang iba. Eto. Tong bahay na to. Yan na ang huling bagay na ibibigay mo sa kanya."

"Pagkatapos non, wala na. Wala na ulit. Ganon talaga, you have to move forward Ara. Hindi pwedeng nakatali ka habang sya ay naka move on na." She said, allowing me to rest my head on her shoulder.

"Kelan ka pa umuwi?" Tanong ko.

"Earlier this morning, wala pa akong natutuluyan." She said.

"Ay, so dito ka titira?" Tanong ko.

"Syempre, oo!" She said that made the two of us laugh.

Yon ang gusto ko kay Jia, marunong sya magseryoso kahit halos puro biro sya. May halong kalokohan man ang bibig nya pero pag nag seryoso yan may katuturan talaga sinasabi nan. And no matter how famous she is, she never forgets us. She always come back to us, and we always welcome her with open arms. No matter how far we reach, we always know we can comeback to eachother's arms.

:)