Fields of Lavenders

11

"What's wrong, honey?"

She asked that made me instantly melt. Damn.

Ara. Don't.

I shook my head firmly. "Your engaged. That's what's wrong." I said before starting the engine again and continued driving. She didn't bother saying anything anymore, we went back to the site and both of us acted as if nothing happened.

Even I can't believe what I said.

Work continued and just like every Architect I kept on monitoring every process of their work and helping them with every step of the way. Even Gab's keeping an eye for mistakes. According to him, he doesn't want to be embarrassed Infront of my former teacher.

When 5:00 hits the clock, the clouds are now painted with pink, orange, and blue clouds. Forming a wonderful, pinkish and golden sunset.

I simply took a photo of it while showing a part of the progress we've made for today, since it's just the first day not much progress has been made but it shall do for day one. I posted it on my story showing a sneak peak of the soon to be built house.

I also bid my goodbyes to the workers and to Gab who plans to stay for a little while since he wants everything to be polished before he leaves. It was around 6:00 pm when I got a message from one of my college friends inviting me to go clubbing, and since I have nothing to do. I agreed.

I just wore a simple red lace spaghetti strap top and black square pants, since earlier I was wearing rubber shoes. I switched it to my regular work heels this time, my hair is in the usual clam with a couple strands falling on the side of my face.

I'm not planning on drinking talaga, they all know me as that types of person who goes to club but doesn't drink at all. People often wonder how people from clubs know me yet I don't drink. Well, I also wonder that.

People would just randomly approach me back in the days saying we bumped to each other, or we made some small talk during a party. But I usually say that they're too drunk and that It wasn't me.

And now, It's been quite some time since we my college friends and I went for a drink. Back in the days we would drink even when it's a normal day, just because we feel like it. Or whenever one of us just decides they want to go.

When I arrived at the said bar, they've already started drinking quite a bit. They offered me shots but I respectfully decline, making them shake their heads.

"Tong si Ara, hindi parin umiinom." One of my friends from college, kiesha, joked.

Their my friends from college, magkakaiba kami ng course pero nang dahil kay Reign na archi din ang course I was able to meet them and be friends with them. Sila ang karamay ko during my college days.

"Oh, broken ba tong isang to?" I pointed at Bianca who doesn't even care kung anong iniinom nya.

"Nagaway." Reign said, making me understood the whole context.

"Ate Ara!" She randomly call. "Nandito ka na pala, inom dali!" She offered me a glass but I decline.

"To naman, kj!" She said before drinking down the shot she offered me. "Dali na ate, para saakin oh! Kahit isa lang please..." She pleaded, offering me another one.

Usually at this time, either Reign or Kiesha would grab the shot and drank it for me. They all know naman na hindi ako umiinom, si Bianca lang talaga ang makulit at sinusubukan pang Ipilit after failing for the past 5 years.

But now, things took a different turn. I grabbed the shot and drank it all in one gulp, making Kiesha, Reign, and Including Bianca shocked.

"Oy, broken ka ba Lavelle?" Kiesha asked.

I smile, "I don't know either." I said.

"Ara, may problema ba?" Reign asked, worried.

I shook my head and smile, "I'm okay." I said, kahit hindi.

To be honest, I don't know.

The past weeks my emotions have been a rollercoaster, sometimes I'm okay. Sometimes I'm crying, sometimes I don't care. It's like I keep on waking up not knowing what emotion I'll have.

And no matter how many times I tell myself that I'm okay. Deep down I'm not. Deep down, I'm affected by the things that's happening around me.

I guess that sense of professionalism isn't working well today.

I've been crying it for the past weeks that It's become very tiring of me to do so, wala naman nagbabago if I keep on crying. I'm still feeling the same pain, the same loneliness.

Walang nagbabago, at walang magbabago.

And I'm sick of acting like something has changed.

Kase wala naman talaga.

Just like how I did before, I tried moving on. But this time, It's harder. And different.

How can I move on if everyday just one glance at her and I'm back to square one already?

How can I move on when I'm still affected by what we had in the past?

How can she act so well while here I am struggling to make it for a day?

And just like Bianca, I started downing shots as well. Reign as usual refused to do so while kiesha drank some as well.

This is probably the first time they ever saw me broken or drunk, wala naman silang alam kung kanino ako broken. That's cause I entered college single, I also graduated single.

No flings, mu's, exes.

Kaya it's new to their eyes for me to get heartbroken. And just like what every drunk and broken person would do, we stood up, and went to the stage. Not minding the situation.

I can feel myself bumping into some people but I kept swaying my hips while I kept my eyes closed. I felt my body stop when I bumped into someone, whoever that is they're just standing there like a tall brick. I open my eyes and look at him.

I gave the guy a drunk smile, I wrapped my arms around his neck and started swaying Infront of him. He later put his arms around my waist and started swaying just like how I did, I bury my face at the crook of his neck. Smelling his perfume.

Suddenly, someone grabbed my arm and pulled me out of the stage. At first I thought It was reign, but when the grip feels too familiar. I knew it wasn't her.

"Ano ba!" I yelled, whining in pain. Complaining how strong her grip is.

"We. Are. Going. Home." She said in a tone I've never heard her use before. Enough to send shivers down my spine, and enough to make me stop complaining.

:)