What Happened to the Boy From Apt 4? (What Happened Series #3)*completed*

9

The following days were the very same. Eat shitty breakfast. Sleep. Stumble to the bathroom to piss. Go for morning walk. Lunch. Watch tv. Go for evening walk. Listen to the doctor or nurse bitch about something i wasnt doing. Tv. Sleep. Dinner if im hungry. I was finally given back my shit. My phone however was busted to shit. My jacket was ripped not that it mattered much. The other clothes i guess were covered in blood and were tossed for bio hazard. 

Whatever.

I realized today that i hadn't gotten ahold of my counselor Beth. Who was keeping me out of prison. But 'eh' what can you do. Nothing much going on in this world anyway. Going back to that one cant be any worse. Today i didnt want to eat much. I just wasnt hungry. It all tasted like cardboard. I remember Anne complaining. I just told her i didnt feel well today. She eyed me but i just laid down.

The following few days i didnt want to do anything except sleep. My eyes were heavy, and my bones ached. My feet wouldn't move. I was so tired. Looking off at the empty room had me closing my eyes. 

I dreamt of being at Towanda's the group of us. Their faces blank. Not even existing. None of them. I dreamt of being beaten. No fear, rage, pain, just visual. Mindless actions. Each time i was alone. 

I woke to someone prepping my arm for an iv. 

"Why?..." I trailed and the person sighed.

"Because your not eating. Your body needs fluids." I flinched at the voice above me. 

"Don't worry about me Jackie. I'll be out of your hair soon..." I tailed off tiredly. I swear i heard her sniffle but i fell back to sleep.

I awoke to a pain in my stomach. I ignored it. Just hunger pains, nothing serious. The burn in my throat from heart burn was steady as always. The breeze from outside flew in and i froze. The scent had me choking on emotion. My eyes began burning my throat closing. 

A gust of wind had me snapping and i was sobbing. I couldnt help it. I was just so tired. There was no hope. I was stuck here alone. The distant beach taunting me. My last memories with her fading on the tide as they were yanked away from me again and again. I was completely and utterly alone. 

There were no tears left by the time the sun had rose and i was no longer tired. I was sweating and the pain in my body was increasing. I looked around the room before slowly getting up and heading to the window. Glancing out i could see the waves in the distance as the crashed against the horizon. To dance with them now. Looking down at the street below i hopped forward. 

How easy it would be. I could see her again so soon. But my body was week and i was shaking. The road disappeared as i stumbled dizzily. Trying i caught myself only to slide down the wall. My knee not holding on any longer. An alarm sounded as my iv came undone from the monitor.

I sighed my head hitting the wall. The door burst open and a flurry of people came in. 

"Wolf. Whats happening?" Jackie asked crouching next to me quickly bracing her hands along my good arm and shoulder. The alarm was turned off.

"I just wanted to see outside." I whispered. I didnt look at them. None of them. I just kept my eyes shut.

"All is fine everyone. Just a trip in the cord." She said and shuffling followed. Alone again. The silence was loud as i took deep hollow breaths. The breeze carrying memories i pushed away with what little fight i had left. I let a breath out through my mouth and it came out wheezy and shaky. "You should have told us you were struggling to breathe." I jumped and opened my eyes to look up at Jackie who was sitting on the floor lent against the bed. I hesitated. Almost to stunned to speak. The silence i wanted she didnt interrupt. Thank god.

"I'm not." I countered. Hoping she would drop it.

"My son was Chronic Bipolar." She trailed starring out the window. "He would hide in his room all day. Barely living just existing. Praying people would leave him be to his own silence."

"I dont think this is appropriate to..."

"He would come home and walk right past his livelihood. Go straight up the stairs and sleep. He would ignore us and wouldnt eat. Then he started to get angry with people. Lashing out at the simplest of things. Then crying uncontrollably. Well i thought it was uncontrollably but it was actually little triggers. Something that he wanted so badly that it would set him off.  I didnt see it because i didnt know. I just knew something was wrong. He committed suicide within the year. The day after we sat in the living room, and he had a strawberry with me for the first time in months. The next day he left a note saying he'd finally felt alive again. But his body shut down before he could actually live again. He knew he was gonna die. Yet he didnt try and stop it. Just accepted it even after he felt alive again." She sniffled and i took a shaky breath. "Do you have anything your fighting for Wolf?" She asked and i hesitated. After a long pause i finally whispered.

"No...." I swallowed the tears forming with the onslaught of emotions. "..there is no hope left for me here, Jackie. I... i just want to be alone." I said and she sniffled. 

"The doctor is gonna have to know. He's gonna want you on .."

"Please.. Jackie no.. just leave me alone please...." I felt the tears fall. Im so close so close to freedom. To family. 

"There is nothing i can do Wolf. It's our job. I could do anything for my son. But i can do something for you. He had people to live for and you..."

"There is no one for me here!" I shouted brokenly at her. My voice breaking. She flinched at my out burst of anger. "No one is there for me to live for damn it. Dont you get it!" I broke out into a coughing fit and she stood pulling me up. I wobbled as she sat me down.  I laid down and she fixed me into bed. I just let the tears slip down my face. They were silent unabashed. I stared at the window. Tonight. I would be free. 

The rest of the day i stayed in bed. In a state of daydreaming. I didnt want to wake nor fully sleep. I just wanted to coast. I thought back to those i'd be leaving. No one but jami came to mind. No one worth living for. Jami will forget about me too. He has to. 

As the dinner hour came to an end the lights outside came on and the sun began to set. It would be night soon and a few hours closer to my ounce of freedom. I frownd as i heard approaching footsteps. She fucking told him. Anger consumed me as i listen to them close in.

Keep walking. Dont stop here. Get away!

The door handle moved and i was internally screaming.

"He's been like this for almost 2 months." Jackie's voice whispered into the dark room. "He's hopeless. Every time i asked if he had someone to call he said no one. He's refusing to eat. He sleeps all day. Cries dry tears all night. If he isn't sleeping. It's just getting worse and i afraid what they would do, if we send him off to the syce ward. He's obviously not mental, just depressed. He wants to be free of his pain and we arnt getting anywhere. Last time i found him he was against the back wall whispering about wanting to look out the window. Then anger. He's has no fight left. You are the only person i could find that he knows."

what the fuck did she do....

"But i understand if you dont want to help i just figured you two may be friends since you know...." She trailed off and they were silent. I was fake sleeping so hard right now. "I'll leave you to decide. If you choose to stay the chair reclines and we will offer the daily meals. Help, hone in, the working together thing i guess. Anyway good luck and let me know if you need anything the buttons on the bed and the wall." Her shoes slapped the ground as she left and the door clicked shut. I heard the person sigh and they approached. 

"Fake sleep is hard when you're on a heartbeat monitor."