Unexpected Love

65. Home Is Where Your Heart Feels Loved

Yoongi was silent, I could see that he didn't recognize this new faze of me, and he didn't like it.

— "Bella, please... you don't know how long I stayed outside your door that night waiting for you to open it, begging you to forgive me. I was so afraid! I thought I lost you for good... and now those thoughts are getting stronger... Bella, plea-a-se, I'm so sorry! It was the worst of me saying that, I would never want you to carry all this on your own, but I was selfish... thinking of me, not listening to what you needed, not supporting you, not noticing you were probably breaking apart... Oh Bella! How did I do that to you?! " — his voice was totally breaking up as his eyes started to fill up with tears.

— "Well... you did, and it did break me apart. I miss home, I miss my dad, my sisters, my friends, I miss my pup!" — I tried my best to contain my tears and succeeded, so I kept talking

— "My Dad told me that home is where my heart felt loved, and I felt that with you, you started to become home to me. But I still need something to keep me connected to my life in Mexico, and I know it sounds stupid, but... Lana is the only thing that can do that. Moving your life halfway around Earth is not something you can do by just snapping your fingers." — I felt that I was gaining back my confidence, so I went on trying to sound calm. — "Let me explain this in a scientific matter."

Yoongi sighed, but did notice my voice turning calmer, so he started to calm down a bit, and let me continue.

— "You see, when you move to a new city, furthermore to a new country, your brain takes it as some kind of loss somehow, you know... leaving everything behind; so it goes through a mourning process; and when you're in a mourning state you need to go through 'closure' in order to move to acceptance and finally embrace the new lifestyle. So, my dear Yoongi, I need that closure in order to move on to my next stage... Seoul. But you didn't want to give me that chance... and it hurt."

He sighed once again, his head low as he tried to reach out to me.

— "I realized that the moment you slammed the door shut, and I've been regretting it since. I understand your needs, and now I understand that in our relationship some things need to be placed first so both of us can move on together. I don't feel insecure anymore about you going back home, because I trust that, once you take care of your things and visit your family, you will come back to me, right?"

— "Right, I will come back... home."

— "Please forgive me, sometimes I get overwhelmed with my feelings for you, and lose control of my common sense. I love you Nae Kkum."

— "Come here, hug me tight, and never let me go... and make love to me."

Yoongi went to where I was sitting and lifted me up, bridal style, and took me to the bedroom to make love to me just like we both yearned for for the past days.