Marooned - Fred Weasley

Chapter 48: Reality Check

My updates are chaotic, I apologize. Anyway, lots of love!!

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Sarah took the books with her, spent the next day inside, reading and spiraling, ended up falling asleep on top of them around 2 in the morning. She had trouble believing no one knew about this and she had to go all the way to Manchester, to ask a complete stranger in hopes to find some answers. Either way, it was a good way to avoid that paralyzing feeling she felt whenever she thought about Sirius. She focused on the new information and the explanation she finally had, the one she'd been searching for every year at Hogwarts.

A Protector. How weird was that? She didn't know what to make of it, even wondered if she should tell anybody. She was already an anomaly with her mark and story, if she added on top of that some sort of mythical magic... It was best to leave it at that.

There was a week left in the month of July, and whatever she did, her mind kept taking her back to Sirius, to Harry, to Remus, she needed to go back and be there for them. She wrote brief letters to Harry, and he'd responded just as briefly, both grieving differently right now, but at least they kept the contact.

With a heavy heart, she gathered up from Manchester and left for the train station, wanting to spend the few hours on the train just listening to music, taking her mind off everything for as long as she could still, she knew it would all come crashing down.

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She Apparated in front of the cottage, it was almost dark outside, and the lights weren't on. Her chest tightened, hoping to find Remus sleeping, but she pushed inside and none of his usual clothes were there. He wasn't there. No one was.

She immediately thought the worst, "Remus!" she shouted, knowing full well no one will answer, but she had to try, maybe he was there after all. Somehow. She dropped her bag on the floor, ran through the house, every room, searching every corner and her breathing fastening every second she spent alone in there. No one was here, Sirius was gone, Remus was gone, she was alone.

Her mind played out hundreds of scenarios, Remus being heartbroken over Sirius and her leaving that he was defenseless, and he got attacked. What about Harry? She remembered Molly's Boggart, how she saw him dead, what if that's how she'll find him? What if Shnaps was wrong about it all? Why did she leave? Her mind was spiraling, bringing her closer and closer to a cataclysmic panic attack.

Until she heard the door open fully, making that screeching sound she knows too well and she ran to it, "Remus?"

It wasn't Remus, it was Fred.

She took a step backwards, not because she saw Fred on her doorstep but because Remus wasn't there with him.

"McCauley," breathed out Fred, walking in and closing the door.

"What-" her breathing became heavier, eyes searching for the missing element. It couldn't be. "Why-" She grabbed a door frame close to her, "Where's Remus, Fred? Where-" she whimpered. "Is he gone, too?" tears climbed up and no mater what she did now, they wouldn't disappear. "Is he-"

She didn't want say it out loud, but her voice came out shakily, "Did I lose them both?"

"No, you didn't!" Fred answered urgently, seeing how she was falling apart before his eyes, in a heartbeat he ran to her and took her in his arms, "Remus is fine, Sarah, he's fine."

"Oh, thank God," she cried, crumbling to the floor, Fred along with her.

That's when it all crashed onto her, pushing forcefully on her lungs and heart, everything she avoided for the past three weeks, everything she felt she couldn't handle mortified her in that instant, and she found herself in Fred's arms as it happened, keeping her heart from breaking completely, he still held it together with a thin string, the thinnest string that didn't break the whole time she spent on that floor, Fred shedding silent tears from hearing hers. He didn't let go of her, kept telling her Remus was alive, Harry was alive, she was alive.