FNAF group chat

FNAF1 (15)

Mike:

Mike:
... What the fuck is this shit?
Freddy:
I look so damn good in that... Chica... you kind of look like shit, no offense.
Chica:
NO I FUCKING DON'T ASSHOLE!
Golden Freddy:
LMAO, who decided that Bonnie could sing? He sounds like a drunk uncle at a wedding.
Foxy:
*hiccup* LAAAAAAAA 🍺 *burp*
Bonnie:
Shut up. I'll have you know that the company was going to make me the singer at one point.
Mike:
... No they fucking weren't. You've always been the guitarist.
Chica:
... what the hell am I supposed to be? A backup singer or something... Like, this cupcake isn't an instrument.
Foxy:
I honestly just thought you were an advertisement to EAT MORE PIZZA!
Chica:
... Yeah, that makes sense.
Golden Freddy:
Why has there never been a drummer animatronic?
Mike:
... I have no idea but that would be fucking amazing.
Chica:
LMAO, what if I one day take Bonnie's place as the guitarist in the band?
Bonnie:
That'll never happen. What will I play then? The bass?
Mike:
... Yes.
Foxy:
Or you'll be dead. LMAO, they'll scrap your ass because they realize you suck.
Bonnie:
If I'm getting scrapped, then so are you asshole. You're always out of commission. Hopefully they replace your ass with someone who can actually do something to contribute to the band. Pirates suck.
Freddy:
NO THEY DON'T! PIRATES ARE COOL!
Mike:
Leave Foxy alone. He's the shit.
Golden Freddy:
You're biased. LMAO
Chica:
Can we have another female in the band. I'm tired of being surrounded by guys...
Chica:
That doesn't mean you can all come stand in a circle around me! GO AWAY!
Freddy:
RING AROUND THE ROSIE!
Bonnie:
POCKET FULL OF POSIES!
Golden Freddy:
ASHES, ASHES!
Mike:
WE ALL FALL DOWN!
Chica:
... FUCKING STOP!
Mike:
Have you guys heard that that song is based on the Bubonic Plague?
Bonnie:
... That sounds deadly. Bubonic Plague... Like, that sound like some sort of disease or something.
Foxy:
... FOR FUCKS SAKE BONNIE! YOU'RE SO DAMN STUPID.
Bonnie:
... I am not.
Freddy:
Look up the Bubonic Plague...
Bonnie:
... Oh. It was a disease, also called the Black Death. That explains why it sounded deadly.
Chica:
So, I just tried to type plague, but autocorrect changed it to flag. Now I'm thinking... We have flags for states, countries, sexualities, gender identities... Hell, even fetishes. What if we had flags for diseases.
Golden Freddy:
THE BUBONIC FLAG! LMAO
Mike:
Could it be considered a pride flag? #InfluenzaFlag #InfluenzaPride
Bonnie:
That's homophobic!
Mike:
No it fucking isn't. I said nothing about gay people.
Bonnie:
Joking about pride isn't funny.
Mike:
I'm not fucking joking about gay pride...
Freddy:
There's more than gay pride... I hear people screaming AMERICAN PRIDE all of the fucking time.
Golden Freddy:
Who the fuck would be proud to have a disease though. #GONORRHEAPRIDE
Mike:
LMFAO, that's fucking hilarious.
Foxy:
OK, but in all seriousness... I once saw a flag that said "Fat Fetish Pride" and it looked like Neapolitan ice cream.
Chica:
LMFAO, send a picture.
Foxy:

Mike:
LMAO, the fuck?
Bonnie:
You're all being offensive today! STOP FAT SHAMING!
Mike:
I'm fucking not! DAMN!
Foxy:
Hell, neither am I. I was just pointing out how the flag looked.
Golden Freddy:
Hell... I don't shame anyone... except Bonnie, Freddy, and that old man who always comes in here just to peel off the wallpaper and eat it.
Bonnie:
DON'T SHAME ME! I'M PERFECT!
Foxy:
... You're far from perfect Bonnie.
Freddy:
Even I, superstar Freddy Fazbear, am imperfect at times. Don't feel bad my bunny buddy...
Chica:
... That big ass ego of yours has to go. You have nothing to back it up... You aren't that great, even though you're the face of the company.
Mike:
Honestly. Even an animatronic hippo that never shuts up would be better than you Freddy.
Freddy:
... FUCK ALL OF YOU!
Foxy:
... Why did you throw a tablecloth? What is that gonna do? LOL
Freddy:
I'M STUCK! SHIT!
Chica:
He's wrapped in the tablecloth.
Mike:
He can deal with it on his own.
Golden Freddy:
Honestly... Fucking idiot.