Destiny ~ Dean Winchester (Love Story)

51

×Dean POV×

Sam and I have driven through the entire city at least 30 times by now and I was getting seriously desperate.

He told me to give Angie some credit, that even if she agreed to any kind of deal, she must have a very good reason. Rationally speaking, I knew for sure she wouldn't lightly make a demon contract, not with her personal experience with them.

What actually sparked my fear were those words I had read in the chapter in the Laundromat.

He'd find out how much she still hated herself, he'd find out how she caught herself thinking each of their kisses would be their last before Dean decided she was worthless too.

Angie's relationship with herself was in ruins. It may have even gotten better since the huge fight caused by Alastair because in that night she stood up for herself and told me the whole truth about what happened in hell but still, it wasn't enough for her self-esteem.

Part of her believed she was worthless. Part of her tried to prepare her for the day I'd leave her.
Maybe Sam didn't fully comprehend those beliefs but I've always felt like I wasn't enough. In Angie's case the guilt of breaking the first seal just loaded on top of that which made me think she'd try almost everything to stop Lilith.

In this moment, I couldn't disregard the possibility of Angie selling her soul - again.

I needed space away from my brother, so I tried getting some snacks out of the automat in front of the motel.

The angels were my last resort.
Tessa had warned me but my mother used to tell me differently: "The angels are watching over you".
And she had been right, the angels got me out of hell.
Point for heaven, zero points for the reapers.

I swollowed my pride and began praying out loud.

"Please I need some help. I'm praying, okay? Come on! Please!"

The night was cold and empty, not a promise of light in sight. I looked around again only to see Castiel appearing a few steps away and I took in a deep breath of relief.
At least he came.

"Is this prayer a sign of faith or a sign of desperate love for Angie?", he wanted to know.

"It can be whatever you want it to be if that means you'll help me.", I avoided his question.
For Angie, I'd cry and pray and I'd beg even if the chances of help were nearly non-existent. I had to try, at least.

"I'm not sure what I can do.", Castiel told me, tilting his head thoughtfully to the side.

"Find Angie, now. Drag her away from Lilith."

"It's a prophecy. I can't interfere."
In moments like this, Castiel acted like any other angel. Without empathy, always focused on some higher cause they didn't even care to explain.

By now I suspected there wasn't even an explanation, I suspected they didn't have the answers either. Which would mean they were blindly following mysterious orders from higher up too. Orders which weren't questioned by anyone.
That thought made me feel uneasy, sick even.

If Castiel wasn't eager on helping me, I'd have to give him a damn good reason to rethink his moves.
If that meant I had to manipulate him into developing a sense of guilt, then it would only be a small prize to pay.