My forever

Chapter 3 - My Best Friend

It's been three years since that first England camp and since i met Leah. From that day we were inseparable its like we both knew that we had this cosmic connection. Unfortunately for me I've always kept my feelings hidden as i have never believed that Leah would ever like me back. I've seen her go through multiple girlfriends in these three years and every single one has made me mad with jealousy but I've never said a word. Leah is my best friend, every England camp we room together and whenever were not on camp we FaceTime all the time sometimes every day. A lot of her girlfriends have hated that we talk so much, but Leah has always chosen me over them saying 'girls come and go but best friends are for life'. I've thought about telling her so many times but every time i do i just get so nervous and back out. We see each other all the time i suppose it helps that we both live in London but i would love to play for the same club so i can be with her every day, she makes me feel safe and throughout all my issues with anxiety and depressions, Leah has always been the only one that can calm me down and make me see sense. Just like she did on that first day in England camp.

I made my professional debut for West Ham two days after my 18th birthday and weirdly enough Leah made her debut for arsenal in the same week. Ever since we have both been consistent players for our clubs and it has been so much fun playing against her, even if she has scored a few goals against me from time to time, always from a header from a corner and believe me she teases me for it. My contract with West Ham is almost up and although my dads going to hate it I'm thinking about leaving. West Ham want me to stay and are willing to give me the captaincy for next season as they say I'm just a natural leader on and off the pitch. But my dream always has and forever will be to play for Arsenal captaincy or not.

My agent has told me that i have received a few offers from other WSL clubs and a few from abroad and i know both me and Leah are praying i get an offer from Arsenal but neither of us are willing to say it. I've told my agent that i want to wait until after the international break to find out as I don't want being with Leah to influence my decision but i know that if an offer from Arsenal comes through I wont hesitate to take it. I've had a good season so far and because of that I've been called up for the England squad for the 2019 World Cup although it doesn't start until the summer and its only May they decided to announce the squad early this year. This international break is our last friendly games on home soil and I'm so excited as my parents are coming to watch both games.

Once again me and Leah have been roomed together and right now were unpacking in our room. 'So Le' I start and she looks up at me from across the room 'how's the latest girlfriend going' she sits down on her bed and runs her fingers through her hair 'Well JJ', that's her nickname for me even though she knows I hate it. I just groan at her. 'I'm not sure to be honest, I like her I do but I just feel like there's a spark missing, like I know that she's not my person.' She has a sad look in her eyes which absolutely breaks my heart she deserves the world and I just wish that she'd find that spark with me. 'Le if you feel there's something missing why try and force it, there's someone out there for you that will love you and give you everything you deserve, you deserve the world and more don't settle for less.' She comes and puts her arm around me and says 'what would I do without you JJ.' She wraps her arms around me to give me a hug 'I'm sorry to ruin this beautiful moment Leah but I hate that nickname and you damn well know it.' She chuckles with her head in my neck, I can feel her warm breath as it touches my skin and it feels my stomach with butterflies. 'Shut up you idiot and just hug me back' she laughs out and so I relax into the hug