Red Owl Vs Blue Raven

Chapter twelve

Director: Dear Chairman.

Fade in to Caboose's mind

Director: I too hold the protocol in the highest regard. The doctrine kept us all safe during the Great War. If you are insinuating, sir, that we violated it in any way, or that we were derelict in our duty to the military, well then I suggest you be direct, and tell me exactly how we did so.

Cut to Church's ghost standing over Caboose's body, surrounded by everyone else

Washington: What is going on?

Church: Wash, stay calm. We can explain.

Washington: I don't want explanations, I want the truth. Now. When were you gonna tell me about this?

Church: Okay, maybe I should start from the beginning. You see, Caboose here, killed me by accident once. Well actually, more than once.

Luz: We started making bids on who kills him next.

Caboose: Not my fault. Tucker did it.

Church: Shut up.

Washington: He killed you. As in... dead.

Sarge: Then we reached an agreement. I built Blue over here a new body-

Church: Agreement? More like we kicked your ass, and you didn't have much of a choice of what you wanted to do.

Hunter: I still think we had the last laugh because of the nuke in your gut thing.

Church: Fine let's call it even when it comes to the robot.

Sarge: Who kicked what now?

Simmons: What're you, an idiot?

Sarge: You wanna take that back.

Church: You guys totally gave up!

Grif: Bullshit.

Church: That was the time that Tex kicked your asses all over-

Washington: Stop. Focus. How did you build him a body?

Sarge: With a robot kit of course! I'd already used our to build our helper. .. Lopez!

Simmons: And a mighty fine job you did too sir!

Grif: Yeaaah, it's always great to have a helper nobody can understand!

Amity: I can. After Luz taught me to.

Sarge: Blue team hadn't used theirs for some reason... they even had an extra!

Washington: And... that didn't strike anyone as odd? That you would have a kit to build a robot that looks like a soldier?

Simmons: That's just standard issue equipment.
.. right?

South/Washington: What?! No!

South: Have you ran into anyone else that has them?

Amity: Does fighting a robot army count?

South: I don't even want to ask.

Luz: Hey don't forget about V! She was awesome a little crazy but awesome!

Simmons: We don't really get out that often.

Sarge: Okay, smart guy. If they're so rare, then why did Command send us upgraded ones when we were told to ship out to Rat's Nest?

Church: You guys went to Rat's Nest too?

Sarge: I used some of the spare parts to spruce up Lopez.

Hunter: Spare parts? Did you fix his voice thing?