3000 Miles for the Boys [completed]

Chapter 35

Life is short. And in life you are faced with decisions. You make choices as you grow. Your thoughts and feelings change as you learn. As you experience things. Brandy was young. She had just started her life. As a freshman, she would have been fourteen or fifteen. She was so young.

She made a decision that she thought was right in the moment. She was so strong. Hearing her story made me think about my situation with Jared. It wasn't terrible and it could be worse. It could have been similar to Brandy's.

I was lucky. I got out sooner than she did. I had warning. Jared was just starting out in his horrible, playerish ways. I was lucky.

Brandy was less lucky. She didn't have warning. She didn't know what could possibly happen or what was to come. She was completely blind to Jared and his real intensions. I knew and I still went through it. I made Chase live through the pain a second time.

I felt terrible. I layed in my bed most of the night looking up at the ceiling, hating myself for doing that to him. I tried to convince myself that it wasn't horrible because I didn't know, but it was horrible. I made him watch another person get hurt by Jared. And he tried to warn me. He told me that it wasn't a good idea to get involved with him. But I didn't listen.

I was selfish. I wanted to experience it for myself. And for what? Just to feel wanted again? To get rid of the pain that Jason left with me? Well I still had that pain, and I had even more piled on top of it all. I had dug myself a deep hole. The hole was too deep for me to climb out of and there was no way to fix any of it. The only way to escape the hole was to fill it in with myself inside.

But I wouldn't give up. I would find another way out of the hole. I would do it for Brandy. Even though I didn't know her, her story spoke to me. It made me realize that I need to keep going. I am faced with terrible obstacles, but I can overcome them.

During my sleepless night, I searched on Pinterest, like the cliché girl I was, for inspirational and motivational quotes. I found one that really spoke to me. It said, 'You were given this life because you are strong enough to live it.' I liked that one. It made me want to not give up. I am strong enough to live this life I am given. It may not be horrible, but it's better than others and I would survive for those who couldn't.

When my alarm blared the next morning at 6:30, I pulled myself out of bed. It was surprisingly cold. I grabbed my sweatshirt off the end of my bed and threw it on. Bella and Kristen were still asleep. Thankfully they slept through my alarm.

I walked towards my door and slipped out, making my way to the bathroom. Keaton was just opening his door and was rubbing the sleep from his eyes when I slipped by him and beat him to the bathroom. "Hey," he yelled.

"Shh," I said holding a finger to my lips. "People are sleeping." He shook his head at me as I closed the door.

It was Monday and I had school. Kristen and Bella would just have to find something in the house or around town to entertain themselves while I was gone. I started applying minimal makeup and brushed my hair, letting it cascade down and around my shoulders.

When I opened the door I found Keaton sitting on the floor by the door waiting for me to get out. I thought he would jump up right away when I opened the door, but he remained sitting on the floor. I looked down at him and found that he had fallen asleep on the floor waiting for me.

I silently laughed at him and walked back to my room. He would wake up eventually. I closed the door behind myself and went to my closet. I pulled on some jeans and left my sweatshirt on. I wasn't really feeling like doing anything today. Not after what I found out last night.

I walked downstairs and made myself a bowl of cereal. Ethan was sitting at the table with Wesley and they were both eating already. "So he told you?" Wesley asked as I sat down next to him.