Better Off Away (BOOK 2)(Wattys2016)

Go Get Coffee With Her

When I leave Jeremiah's office I know what I need to do. I stop by the Lavender Room and grab my phone before heading to the gardens, hoping to find myself alone. Sure enough, the garden is abandoned and the remnants of the picnic Jack and I had are long gone.

I find a bench and sit down before letting my emotions get the better of me. For the first time since leaving home I cry. I cry for my homesickness. I cry for the lies I've told. I cry for the guilt I feel. More than anything, I cry for the person I am becoming and how much I hate this new version of me.

I think of who I used to be: a girl whose dreams had no barriers. I remember how I believed in human beings and how I thought anything was possible. Where is that girl now?

I wipe at my face, smearing the wetness, and pull out my phone. I dial the number and pray that they answer.

One ring. Two rings. On the third ring they answer.

***

"Mace! How are you?!" Gemma's voice is filled with life. I can feel her vigor through the line and I envy her.

I envy that she never lost sight of who she truly is.

A new wave of emotion hits me, though the tears are silent. "Gem... I'm so confused."

In a split second I hear the change in Gemma's demeanor. A sharp breath is taken on her side and she lets it out slowly, processing. "Macey, what's wrong?"

I pour it all out. I bare my soul.

Gemma listens, not commenting until the very end of my long explanation. "Macey, love, you're so strong. Never forget you're a fighter."

"But, Gem... I think I actually like Jack. And that's what I'm afraid of most. I want to leave." My voice trembles and I close my eyes, tears leaking out.

"Macey, hon... My heart's breaking. I wish I was there for you. I'm sending you a hug right now." I can hear how sincere Gemma is, only making me miss her even more.

"What should I do, Gemma?"

"Keep fighting, Macey. I'm not sure what that'll mean, but follow your gut feeling. Hey, maybe visit your aunt. That might help."

"Thanks, Gem. You're such a great friend." I wipe my face, knowing it's time to get back up and keep going.

"Love ya. Call me again. I'll always answer."

We say goodbye and I return to the Home - ready to fall asleep and dream of when I still believed in fighting.

***

When Monday comes, I expect to sleep in and go to breakfast at the House, but I'm awoken by Jack's gentle hand shaking me. I roll over and scowl at him. We didn't see each other at all over the weekend which is why I just automatically assumed there would be no morning coffee. He had disappeared and with him, Mia had as well. It didn't take a genius to assume they'd gone off together.

I hate that I'm jealous. I hate that I'm a liar.

"What do you want, Jack?" I whisper yell at him since Lola's still completely asleep. If we wake her up she'll be a beast.

His eyes show a flash of confusion. "Don't you want to go to Glory's for our coffee?"

I have a conflict of emotions. Part of me wants to forget about Jack and go back to sleep. The other part of me wants to go to coffee so that I can get an explanation from him. Where did he go with Mia?

I look at his handsome face and remember our kiss. I know I'm a goner. I nod my head and tell him in a whisper that I'll be ready in twenty minutes.

I take a quick shower and get dressed in a black skirt with a white silk tank top tucked in. I scrunch my hair and do my make-up, then meet Jack after sliding a pair of flats onto my feet.

Today, however, is different from the rest of the week. Jack doesn't take me to the taxi, but rather, his precious Porsche. I look at it in confusion. "You can't have this until Wednesday."

He smiles proudly. "My father said I could... Said we could."

I look at him skeptically, my arms crossed. "Really? That surprises me. Why would he do that?"

"Because I earned it back. It wasn't easy, but I wanted it really badly." He's practically beaming, but I can't help but frown, still upset with him.

"Does this have to do with your absence? Why I didn't see you or Mia all weekend?" My jaw clenches and I hate how obviously jealous I am.

Jack looks at me, guilt in his features. He swallows once, hard. "Listen, Sweetness, I've told you: I don't like her."

"Really, Jack? Maybe you should love her...because she loves you and to be honest, I'm not in the mood for playing second string to her or anyone." I don't mean to word vomit all of it, but I do.

Jack looks at me, shocked. "Sweetness, please, let me explain. My father wants -"

"When will you get it, Jack? I don't care about stupid excuses. What did you really do this weekend, hm? Tell me this, did you kiss Mia? Did you f*ck with her?" Bitterness edges my words and I cross my arms tighter, not wanting my voice to quiver like it is.

Jack's face is full of guilt at my words. He stands there, speechless and shocked. I feel shame pour over me as disbelief fills me. A bitter, hollow laugh escapes me as I shake my head and slowly back away from Jack.

"You really are a jackass. Stay away from me, Jack. You obviously chose Mia - go get coffee with her."

***

For the rest of the week, Jack and I don't talk. We don't get coffee, we don't ride to work together. Even when our punishment is over I still take a taxi to work every day, avoiding him religiously. Jack tries to get my attention and he's tried to get me to come round, but I'm not going to fall for someone who's just using me.

Like you're using him?

Damn. Well, maybe I'm done with this stupid contract. I'll have to speak to Jeremiah. I'll tell him Mia's much more suited for Jack. Jeremiah will have to let me out of the contract once he realizes I'm unwilling.

I'm thankful when the last day of working with Jack in Customer Service comes. It means I won't have to see him all day every day. Friday evening the interns gather around in one of the sitting rooms to watch some TV and just have a laugh. Once again, I'm grateful Jack isn't present.

"So, what should we do tomorrow?" Lola asks everyone.

I shrug from where I'm sitting next to her. "I'd like to go into the City... I haven't really gotten the chance to explore it yet."

Lola raises her eyebrows, obviously thinking about my coffee "dates" with Jack. She knows something went down between us, but she doesn't bring it up. I'm not sure what I would say if she did bring it up.

Tom chuckles nervously. "Yeah, I think we all would like that. Last time was eventful, but not the good kind."

Everyone laughs and I join in, trying to be happy, but the thought of ending the contract weighs upon me heavily. Something off to the side of the room catches my eye and I turn to see Mia talking to Jack. I can't see Jack's face, but Mia's laughing and touching Jack's arm. My stomach contracts and I feel sick as I watch them.

Mia's eyes glance over Jack's shoulder and meet mine, triumphant in their stare. She smirks, as if saying she is the winner. I shake my head, wanting to look away, but finding myself trapped. A moment later I really wish I had turned away because Jack is looking at me, conflict evident on his face.

I resist the urge to flip the both of them off and turn to Lola. "I'll be back."
Lola looks at me funnily, probably wondering why my voice is croaky or why I'm suddenly so somber. "Where are you going?"

"I need to speak with Jeremiah."