England x Dead! Child! Reader

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I'm Not Okay (I promise) [UNINTENTIONAL SONGFIC. *whispers* MCR is lyfe]

Requested by @Lynn_Loravile

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How does one describe the sorrowful pain when the heart has been shattered into pieces that outnumber the stars? In the years that have rolled away in time, Arthur Kirkland mourns everyday. His soul washed completely in sorrow, even after several hundred years of the death of his beloved child. Tears swell in his eye sockets. Rebellious tears trickle down his smooth face, obscuring his vision. A sniffle or two escapes his lips. Though it had been too long to worry about it, this was something much more to him. His first child. His first mini-him. Now that little ray of his sunshine was taken away fron him. He regrets his country's mortality rates, especially at younger ages. His long deceased wife, a charming maiden of the early 18th century, bore him that child. Sadly, she passed after giving birth to their first child. And now, he is here, standing in front of the grave that buried the coffin of his first child, (Name).

The year was 1897. He had dealt with many wars after the death of (Name), especially with the ones with Alfred. Oh, Alfred. Even he could not measure up to the sentimental values as much as his first. It was true that he had found Alfred, the personafication of America, and raised his as his own. By the time he was at the age his first child was when they died, Alfred vegan to rebel against him, something not as bad as death, but still heart-wrenchingly terrifying. Twice have his heart been broken, and twice had he fallen for the children whom he loved.

"And they say I need help.." True as it was, France, or Francis, and a select few of his neighbors have always told him that he was in need of mental and emotional aid. He refused, of course, stating that he was fine. On the inside, however, he was broken.

|| Well if you wanted honesty

|| That's all you had to say

Truly, anything this tragic would go away easily, right? It would be a lie if anyone says 'no.' For several years, Arthur has had to endure the pain, and when he found Alfred, he was determined to raise him like he wasn't able to raise (Name). Nothing turned out well, and he had only himself to blame.

|| I never want to let you down

|| Or have you go, it's better off this way

Kneeling down in front of the grave stone, tears began to pour. Oh, the agony; bittersweet agony that lingers in the soul for who knows how long. 'Tis a pity that someone such as he would suffer much damage even though everyone would go through it with loved ones. However —  this one was much different. To him, it wasn't a death in his family, it was the act of taking away his devoted love; such a crime to be committed.

|| For all the dirty looks

|| The photographs your boyfriend took

He never got to see his own child grow up. Seven years of age before death has taken the toll. Severe punishment, as cruel as it was, showed Arthur the dangers of falling for someone. The guilt trip lingers for years, and though they say memories fade overtime, it was all still too vivid in his head.

There were times even he wanted to die just to be with his loved first child. Being immortal, though, gave him some setbacks that were not easily overlooked. He was not capable to dying by means of suicide, and perhaps that was the best thing to come out of immortality.

|| Remember when you broke your foot

|| From jumping out the second floor?

His hand grazed the stone, feeling the coolness of it fill him with anguish. Sobs threaten to spill from his mouth as he covered it with his other hand. Clouds scatter in the sky, the sun setting off in the west. The coolness of the air only added to his sadness. Only minutes ago, it was like the atmosphere around him was trying to cheer him up, but now —  now, it was ruined. It has given up.

A scream; horrifying and filled with many mixed emotions, filled the air. In a fetal position, Arthur lied beside the gravestone, his eyes red and swollen. He had fallen; fallen into the abyss of eternal sadness.

|| I'm not okay

||I'm not okaaay

|| I'm not okay

|| You wear me out

He lied there for what seems like hours, which in reality, was only a good ten minutes.

"Why must I suffer so?" He asked himself as he stopped his messy sobs. Tears stained his face as he slowly got up. His eyes glued to the spot he lied on.

"I wish to be with you forever..."

"O sweet child o' mine."










A/N: My birthday gift to you guys! *sings happy birthday to myself* I am actually quite happy with how this turned out. Oh! And I've seen the new Star Wars movie. It was meh, but it was Star Wars. Also... I GOT ANT MAN FOR MY BIRTHDAY AND IM SO HAPPYYYYYY

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