A New Life (River Phoenix)

A New Feeling

Three days go by and River is beginning to get ready for filming.

We stay together tonight because tomorrow he would be leaving.

-

It's 2 in the morning when my eyes burst open and I immediately feel unwell.

Around me is complete darkness; slight light shines through onto the dresser from the open window.

Next to me is a sleeping River. He lays on his back, his mouth slightly parted while his arms and legs occupy most of the space on our shared bed.

I can see the dull outline of his face and pointed nose as he snores quietly, yet just loud enough so I can notice.

I blink a couple of times to adjust my eyes to the light, but the more I try to adjust myself, the more my stomach turns.

Rolling over and pushing the heavy covers off of me, I groan in frustration.

It must have been louder than I thought because River soon awakes.

He doesn't speak, but I can tell by his heavy breaths and slight movement that he's awakening.

I'm still trying to adjust comfortably when I feel his hand wrap around my upper arm.

The moment he touches me, my body begins to throb.

The heat from his body soon seeps into mine; it's an odd and uncomfortable sensation, but I can feel it.

"Can you," I start weakly, but soon find my head hanging over the side of our bed.

His grip on me tightens as I hold my mouth together, feeling a rush up my throat.

"What is it?" He questions with panic in his voice.

Without answering I get up and dart for the bathroom.

I can't see much through the swallowing darkness of the night, so I find myself crashing into corners and doors on my way.

Every hit makes me even sicker.

I'm so dizzy by the time I arrive in the bathroom that I immediately drop to my knees and set my head on the toilet.

I throw up once.

Twice.

Three times.

River rushes in behind me and is about to approach me before I wave him off.

He looks worried and slightly disgusted, but refuses to leave.

At the same time I hear Flea's voice echo through the bathroom.

"Holy fuck," he says. "Is she alright?"

"I don't know," River answers for me. "I just woke up and she was kind of freaking me out. Like, all sweaty and moving around."

I can tell by his voice that he's frightened and confused, so I try to speak up once I know I've finished.

"I'm okay." I say, even though I don't believe it myself.