Teaching Bangtan [JM]

Chapter 28

47836 (words so far)
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JIMIN'S POINT OF VIEW:

And so I sang for her.

"Between dawn's shadows, running lights- looking like a bonfire.
Glow of the cool morning.
Over there at the bottom is our nest.
Is this silence an opportunity, or my wish, or just my own thoughts?
Should I sit still, or interfere? But what if it's a mistake?"

You'd think it'd be easy for me, me being me, me being an idol.
Because I, Park Jimin, have sung, danced-and even torn my shirt off, in front of thousands of people.
But this wasn't easy. This was difficult, because it had to be perfect.
And it felt as though no matter how hard I tried, it wouldn't be perfect.

"Atop of the morning sunrise, laying down and legs crossed-
Let's just stay like this.
Like in a warm blanket, when sunrays cover us we will melt away.
We will come back right away after just one night.
A light that watched over our young lights, let's go see it again.
Sitting on the sunshine, sunshine is over me, she gets over me.
Make us feel alive, sunshine is over me, she gets over me.
She will love,
all the above, past and present, fast forward.
Who will define? Whatever they say, we stay the same."

I continued to the best of my ability, I continued singing as I stared at her-
because I could stare at her- because her eyes were closed, because she wouldn't know that I was staring at her.
I hesitated.
Her lips curled into a soft smile, "Keep singing, it's perfect." She quietly told me.

And so I kept singing.

"Yesterday, today and also tomorrow.
In the future, still staying
the same. Still staying the same.
Sitting on the sunshine, sunshine is over me, she gets over me.
Make us feel alive, sunshine is over me, she gets over me."

This time, she reached for my hand. It was warm- and, well, clammy. But that was okay, because I'm pretty sure my hand was clammy too. I was nervous.
I was nervous I would forget the lyrics, nervous I would be off key, nervous I would stutter, nervous I would mess up, nervous that I'd disappoint her once more, nervous that I would wake up and this would all be a dream. Nervous that this moment, this feeling- that this would end. That it would slip out of my grasp.

"She will love,
all the above, past and present, fast forward.
Who will define? Whatever they say, we stay the same."

I tightened my grip on her hand, to get our hands as close to eachother as possible.
So she could feel my warmth, so she could feel warm.
So she wouldn't be cold.
I want to keep her warm.

She slowly exhaled and looked at me, "Thank you" she said as she looked into my eyes.
She had nice eyes.
I never really think about the way she looks, it's her- just her- that I like.
Not a specific part of her, just her.
Of course, I also like the those trivial things that normal people like about other people- like her smile, her eye colour, the length of her hair, her hands, her laughter.
But those things aren't why I like her.

"So, are you going to sing for me?" I asked, smirking.

She burst out laughing and nudged me (And thank God she did, it lightened the mood),
"Are you serious? HaHAhA. I suck at singing and you know it."