If only it was an Illusion!

Chapter 10 : Not the girlfriend!

Amanda's POV

"Mom, you need to keep the fact that ' we know the father of Sam's baby ' as a secret ", I said while making an air quotation with my fingers."A real secret", I exaggerated the word secret.

"But Ammie, I guess we should tell her ", Mom took a sip of her coffee while we sat and discussed real important issues rather than gossiping about our relatives, like a normal daughter and mother, usually do.

"No, N + o = a NO ", I tried explaining her in mathematical language so that the concept of not telling Samarrah the secret directly varied with her mouth. I hated mathematics a lot but sometimes it added humor to our sentence so I used it, though this situation was a bit critical.

I took the coffee mug in my hand and walked upstairs towards Sam's room. "Don't tell her anything", I mouthed her from upstairs. My mom had a kind gentle heart that could be fooled easily, and that's why I kept saying the sentence "keep it a secret" to her after every hour.

Sam had left her room's door ajar and was busy applying a reddish shade of lipstick. Ugh, Sam, Gina and makeup. I knocked softly and she signaled me to come in with her hands. I walked silently towards her and sat on her bed. Once she was done applying her lipstick (which was an awfully long time), she sat down on her dressing table stool and began applying mascara. Was she freaking kidding me? I had come up to talk to her, not to get a makeup tutorial from her!!

"Did you take an appointment?" I finally questioned getting irritated by the silence.

Looking at me with the most boring expression anyone could ever put up, she spoke, "I clearly stated before, personal questions won't be answered". She then highlighted her cheeks with the blusher, which obviously got on my nerves. She was extremely obsessed with makeup, just like Gina and maybe that's why she had a better bonding with her compared to me. "Makeup soothes us and keeps us calm. It's our passion and that's what passions are for, right?" is what they both told me every time I questioned them.

"Well, too bad, 'Cause A) you are my fucking sister, so cut the personal bullshit. And B) it's not a question! It's a fucking necessity!" I half yelled-half spoke, losing my patience.

"What if I don't want to abort my child?" she challenged, raising her eyebrow.

"You can't even afford his diapers", I remarked sarcastically.

"Ammie, you can yell all you want, but I'm not a murderer for God's sake! I WILL NOT MURDER MY CHILD!!" she shouted, contradicting my abortion statement.

"It's not murdering for fuck's sake! You're only nineteen years old and you don't even earn! How the hell will you take the responsibility of the newborn when you can't even handle yourself?" I questioned. I couldn't just listen to her childish decisions calmly.

"What if his or her father comes back? He will be so mad at me when he comes to know that I aborted our child, that I killed our child", she spoke softly, her voice cracking at the threat of tears.

"Hmpf, he wouldn't even care", I said disgustedly. Little did she know that James, the so-called father of her baby didn't give a shit about my sister, he hadn't inquired once about Sam's health or well-being. Instead, he was busy making out with other girls, including me, her sister. The thought honestly made me feel like shit, but I was doing it for Sam.

She wiped a tear that had run down her cheek, cleared her throat, and replied, "You don't even know him."

Her statement hit me like a truck. I tried my best to not show it on my face 'cause that would've given everything away, but it ripped me apart from within. Seeing Sam cry had always been my weakness and it tore me every single time. It was like my own heart being stabbed. It hurt to see Sam's condition. But what hurt more was that I was so helpless right now. Sam was trying her best to put up her walls, to not let people see how broken she was from within, which indeed was very brave of her.