Never Look Back

Chapter 21: That's not creepy at all

"I have something to tell you Tiffany"
I stared at him blankly before he spoke again. "I'm you're brother, mom had me when she was young and put me up for adoption. She would come see me and show me pictures of you and dad. Actually at her funeral I was in the back I had on a black and gray suit"

I thought back to when my mom's funeral was and it put me in shock. "Oh my god" I said stepping away from him. I stared at him for quite awhile before he came over to me and was saying my name pulling me out of my thoughts. "I'm sorry" I said "it's ok" he said replying back to me. "So Uh what now?" I asked still kinda shocked, "well we could get to know each other. Oh and let me introduce myself in the right way now. Hi my name is Colin Joy I am your brother" he reached out and shook my hand. I laughed, he was just like my mom in so many ways but had the looks of my dad. "You know you remind me alot of mom" he said making me sit beside him, "and you remind me alot of my dad or I mean our dad" I giggled nervously and shook my head in stupidity. "Hey don't be nervous, think of it this way. I knew you for a long time you just didn't know me" I looked at him and laughed "That's not creepy at all" we both started laughing. "Yeah you are right. That did come out a little creepy, I swear it didn't sound that creepy in my head" all you could hear now was both of us laughing hysterically.

We sat on the couch talking all most all night, seems like he knew me alot more than I expected. I mean he is my brother that knew about me but I didn't know about him. It made me wounder, why didn't my parents tell me? We're they ashamed that they put him up for adoption?

Colin decided on staying at the house for awhile just to get to know me and also he didn't have anywhere else to go. I would tell him to get a hotel room but we are on the outskirts of the city so there are no hotels. I walked into my room face planting myself on the bed, I let out a sigh when I realized Logan wasn't here yet and it is like 1 in the morning. I stood back up grabbing the house phone and dialed his number, it went straight to voicemail. I dropped the phone back on the charger before I walk down the steps and lock the door. If he isn't here by now he doesn't need to be here, so I am locking him out. Since I am the only one with the house key because it's on my car keys, he wouldn't be able to get in.

"Does anyone else live here or do you live by yourself?" Colin asked walking over to me and I was walking away from to door. "Uh no, there is someone else who lives here but he isn't getting in tonight" he laughed "why?" He asked trying not to laugh. "He went out leaving me here to be depressed, he wants to go out and drink and have a good time but I am stuck home trying to get over us losing a baby" Colin looked taken back. I totally forgot he didn't know about that, I was trying to keep it a secret from him but that obviously didn't work. "You didn't tell me. I'm so sorry for you're loss." He sounded upset when he said that. "No it's ok, I mean it's not ok but you don't have to feel bad. It just wasn't time for us to have a kid and my body couldn't take it" I felt a tear fall own my face. It felt good to let some of this out, even though Jacky or Ginger would love to help me. He walked over to me as I broke into tears, he pulled me into a hug and I just cried. It hurt and it hurt like hell to tell someone I lost my baby, then you have Logan who could care less that we lost it. "Why don't you go get in bed?" He said more as a question. "Yeah ok. Goodnight and if you need me I am in the master bedroom. I think you can figure out which one it is, but I think you can just help yourself to anything you want. You're my brother you're suppose to come eat all the food and bug me" we both laughed and I let go of him and walked back to my room. I grabbed the phone and tried calling Logan again. But there was no answer. With all that happened to me today I was officially the most tired person on earth. I laid down and looked at the ceiling as my eyelids got heavier and heavier.

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I woke up to the sound of someone beating on the door. I put on my slippers and walked down the steps to find an angry Logan, I totally forgot I locked him out. I rolled my eyes at him and pulled the blind shut and went to the kitchen and made me some coffee. He stopped banging on the door and I went to the back and made sure the back door was locked and I also shut those blinds. I was pissed at him and nothing is going to change that, it's his fault not mine so he can go fuck off. I walked back to the kitchen got my coffee and went to sit in the living room to watch some TV. I was flipping through the channels when I looked out the window and say Logan watching me drink my coffee. I went over and shut the curtain and sat back down. "What the hell is going on?" Colin asked making his way through the hall. "Just Logan trying to get in but I won't let him" I said evilly. "Tiff just because he made one mistake doesn't mean you have to lock him out forever" I looked at him in disbelief then realized he doesn't know the same Logan as I do. "Logan in a drunk and a druggy I don't want that in my life" I said snapping a little. He looked at me and made his way to the kitchen. Why is he so upset about it? It's not like I am committing a crime.

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It's been about 3 hours and I still haven't let Logan in. Currently he is sitting on the porch looking out into the yard. I joined he tried to check his phone but it was dead, I laughed to myself. I went over to where he was sitting and cracked the window a little. "Explain" was the only thing I said before he jumped up and turned around to look at me. "I would explain if you let me in" he said with an attitude. "Then I guess you aren't getting in" I was getting ready to shut the window but he stopped me, "ok, ok I will tell you. So last night you were like out of it and it was scaring me so I decided to call a few friends to go have a drink to get my kind off things. I didn't come home til earlier because one, I was high and two, because I was worried that you were still going to be all weird." I can't believe he is telling me I am being weird, does he not know what the hell is going on in my head right now?

"Listen here asshole! I am weird because I LOST my first child meaning it is no longer alive! I am not going to be ok after that happened I probably will never be the same when it comes to that stuff! So you can shut your fucking mouth before I cut you're dick off and flush it down the toilet! And for you're information I was being weird because I am trying my hardest not to cry every fucking minute of my life!" I could see Logan's face go from angry to having a sorry look. "I-I didn't know" he said my guess trying to get me to let him in. "Nice try asshole you can go stay somewhere else or a couple of days I will have my brother take care if me since you won't!" I shut the window and ran up to the room. I swung open the door and went straight to his dresser, I grabbed some of his clothes and threw then out the window. I didn't give him his charger because I want him to feel helpless. I stomped off to the bathroom and jumped up on the counter to take a breath.

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Hello lovely people

Here is a really long update for me. Mine are never this long. I was just having so much fun writing it.

Also sorry for any mistakes.. it's kinda late for me to be writing so my brain isn't functioning correctly.

Please keep voting and everything like that!!

Love you
Gracey