The Road to Bethyl {Slow Updates}

Thoughts...

Daryl's P.O.V.

"Beth!" I scream at her lifeless body. Either it's lifeless or it's about to be. Both ways, I'm not leaving her here. Not when there's a chance of saving her. This dumbass group of attacking assholes can suck it.

I grab ahold of Beth's body, bridal style and run as fast as I can to the main building. How we were not ambushed by walkers or outsiders, I'm not sure. It's a question that I'm sure will be stuck in my mind for forever.

I reach the front doors. With one powerful kick to the right one, I get the attention of a middle aged man in overalls that opens the entrance for me when I begin to yell. I run past him, to safety.

"I NEED A MEDIC!" I scream, in a panic.

I look down to Beth and attempt to keep her awake, or to wake her up. I yell her name, "Beth!"

"Follow me!" I hear someone to my right say. I jog and attempt to keep up with her. She goes around a corner and into the first wooden door on the right side of the long hallway. I walk in behind her an see a bed to lay Beth on. I lay her down, attempting to regain the feeling in my tired arm.

The arm that was holding up Beths lifeless upper body.

"What happened?!" The nurse lady asks me again, snapping me out of my thoughts. Honestly, I don't know how to say this. That of all the injuries, she's dealing with an attempted suicide.

Or a suicide.

I should stop thinking.

"A-attempted Sui-cide," I choke out. I now realize that my throat is in knots along with my stomach, and my face is swamped with tears. My arm is still numb and painful and my legs are sore from running with the extra weight. But I'm not important. Beth is the priority.

"Oh.." She states. For a moment, she's not sure what to do. The air in the room has become stiff. But then, the lady checks the wound and gets her hooked up to an IV. The motions all become blurred in front of me and I see that I have time to process what has happened.

My mind starts replaying the scene over and over and over again. Where the knife slides across her skin to ultimately end her life. To end Beth Greene all together.

But even if that knifes' job was done, and her heart stops beating, it would not have killed Beth Greene. Because even if she dies on this table, she will always live on inside of me. & no weapon or walker can stop that.

Inside of every thought.

Every action.

Every choice.

There will linger at least a hint of Beth in each. Because she has become a part of me. My thoughts are unspoken, but they are true. I just don't know how I will go on..

I don't know if I should. I mean, I know that I shouldn't try to kill myself or let myself die, but could I even be as independent as I was before? Could I be mentally sane with out Beth?

This lovey dovey stuff is so out of my element, I don't even know how to act. I don't know what I can do and what I can't anymore. Losing her is like.. Losing myself.

I just need a sign to know to keep fighting. That there's even a possibility that I can make it through this.. Any sign at all.

I hear the nurse from the other side of the table say, "She's alive."

Well, that was fast.

"Beth! Beth, are you there?" I ask.

I see as she's unconscious but alive nonetheless. I definitely owe this nurse a huge favor after this.

"Yeah, she was very fatigued before the accident had occurred. Then, the loss of blood, and her immune system seems to had already been weak. Seems like she was early into a sickness or was just getting over one. That can also be a problem when trying to avoid an infection from the wound."

"Is she going to make it?" I asked. It's not that I didn't care about the other stuff. I mean, I did. I just need to know this before I can get my hopes up.

"She is alive. For now," my breathing stops, "it's very shaky at the moment. Her bodily systems might not be able to get her off of deaths' door."

"She's a fighter. She can make it," I look down to Beth and gaze upon her worn out self, "She can do anything."

I see the nurse gazing at me. Watching me watch Beth. Her eyes flicker between me and her. "How long have you been together?" She asks. She doesn't look judgmental. She doesn't look rude or sickened. She looks concerned for her well being and my mental state.

"We're not officially together," I reply.

"Oh. Why not?" The nurse lady asks, "You love her. You should be with the one you love."

I stay silent to this reaction of hers.
I don't know if I love Beth.
I mean, I think I do.
Maybe.

My head spins and I sit down.

"Sorry," She mutters, "I'll be in the hallway." She saunters out, leaving the door closed behind her.

I pear over to Beth's struggling body once again.

"Don't leave me behind, angel.."

~•~•~
(sorry I didn't do the convo in his P.O.V. it would have just been the same as the other)

A part of me is flipping shit as I let the door shut behind me, screaming about how I shouldn't leave her alone. That she'll only try to leave me again..

You need to trust her. The other half of my mind tries to talk some sense into myself.

This side is right. I should trust her. She's not a child. She's Beth Greene, a mature adult who's able to take care of herself even though half the time, I wish she needed me anyway.

Like now. I wish she needed me. If she needed me, she would stay with me. Here. And enjoy being alive with me for as long as we could..

What did I do that was so wrong? Am I the reason that she wants to die?

"But you're Daryl Dixon. You don't need anyone."

Oh, if you could only read my mind.

I strolled to a cot in the main area of the crowded building, everyone still on edge from the attack. I go to a pretty secluded area, free of anyone to bother me in my mentally shaky state.

I lay down and try to brush off the thoughts that keep popping up in my mind and the adrenaline still slightly pumping through my veins. My mind tries to convince myself to peacefully sleep tonight. After a while, it seems to work. Before I officially drift off, I hear myself accidentally think out loud, "Don't leave me.."

~•~•~•~•~•~•~

Long chapter bc I love you guys and WE HIT 10K READS AHHHH

Also, how do I check the ranks on this book? Idk how that works lol but I'm curious

Comment your thoughts! Or just to talk to me haha! VOTE PLZ and idk add this to your reading list/library if you liked it or loved it or whatever.

thought I would show you Daryl's thoughts bc there's aLOOOT lol

Ily guys and thank you for reading!

Kbye❤️