Broken Melody

Melody

My eyes never left the sky as I watched it turn from blue to almost midnight. The stars danced high in the sky, reminding me that there is more than what meets the eye. I have tried to fall asleep, but every time I did. I saw my dad's face and heard his yelling, my eyes went to the pill bottle on my nightstand. I had run out of my sleeping pills last night and was running low on my anti-depressant and anxiety pills. My mind was so far gone that I wasn't even sure if Catalina was still up, it was the weekend and she might be grading school papers, right? I couldn't get the pills unless my foster parents went with me.

Grabbing my case that has all of my pill bottles I slowly made my way downstairs. But not before poking my head into Evan's room. His chest slowly rose and fell telling me he was asleep, I would have to tell him sorry later. Daisy scared me when she nudged my hand but I smiled down at her afterwards. There was a light coming from a room just below the stairs and I wasn't sure if it was okay to go in.

Thinking it would be a start I raised my hand just as the door moved and my hit a solid chest. My eyes went wide because I wasn't expecting someone to be coming out when I was going to knock. I looked up and came face to face with Blaze I think his name was. He chuckled when he saw my expression.

"You got a visitor brother." He stepped to the side and Bo came into view. I felt my cheeks heat up because the room was full of bikers. "Go on honey they won't bite."

My eyes scanned for Catalina but I didn't see her, my eyes met Bo's and he seemed to understand what I was doing by the answer he gave me. "Catalina stepped out for a bit with the girls, is there anything I can help you with."

I nodded my head as I looked down at my feet, part of me wanted to raise the bag to show him. But I didn't want everyone to know that I have to take medications. Looking up at him again I gave him my best pleading look. "Brothers, can you give us a moment." Everyone stood up and left the room giving me warm smiles. The action made me frown because I wasn't used to this at all.

Walking into the room, I made sure they couldn't hear us then I placed my bag on his desk. He studied my bag for a few minutes until I held out my empty sleeping pills and he took it from me reading the label. As he did that I took the others out to show him that I was almost out. "I wasn't aware that you took these." He looked to me as he sat back his eyes searching my face. Reaching for the notepad on his desk I figure this was best for now.

"I can't sleep without them, I used the last one last night and they won't let me get the refills unless an adult is with me."

"Why didn't you tell us this morning or last night when you knew you were going to be out? We could have gotten them for you already."

I looked down at the notepad feeling ashamed of myself, part of me wanted the refill because I wanted to take all of them at once and just end things. Then I think of Evan and how I can't do that to him. "It is bad enough that I'm known as a mute freak, I don't want them to add pill popper to the list."

"You are not a mute freak," I jumped at the sound of his voice, it was firm and full of something I wasn't sure of. "You've seen things that you shouldn't have to see, you have a good reason as to why you are not talking today." Casting my eyes down to the floor I waited for him to continue. "Do you need the sleeping pills tonight?"

I pondered his question.

Closing my eyes, I tried to relax for a few minutes but then I heard that horrible voice and my eyes snapped open. Nodding my head while biting my lip to hold back a whimper that was threating to come out. Even though my dad was locked up, he was still haunting me. There was that fear of him getting out one day and coming to finish the job he started years ago. As I kept my eyes on the floor I got the familiar itch to cut again. No one knew I did this, it was also the reason why I never wear shorts or skirts.