Heal My Heart

T w e n t y : P u p p y

A/N: Comment & Vote

I hit the rewind button again.

It was the short shows that played between the long ones. What had Scott called them...? Oh, right. Commercials.

I liked this one best. The bear. So I watched it over and over and over again. I knew the words and could follow along.

I can do this right.

I had Milo in my arms. He had said I was stupid and slow. Scott said he was wrong but I knew that Connor was the smartest person I'd met so far. He owned a whole company.

Scott was smart too but... He was too nice. He told me fibs just so I could be happy.

I closed my eyes and mouthed along to the words.

Cheddar Cheese meowed.

I probably wasn't supposed to take him out of the room but I wanted to cuddle with him. And I wasn't smart enough to really know better.

He was curled up in front of me, purring as I pet him. I jumped a bit as the door opened. Bailey came in and held out a paper bag. "Can I eat lunch with you?"

I lifted and dropped my shoulders, scooting over and hitting the rewind button. Bailey sat down beside me and pulled out a sandwich. "What are we watching?"

"The bear." I whispered.

"I mean what show."

I hit the rewind button. "This show."

"It's not a show Puppy. It's a commercial trying to sell fabric softener."

Fabric softener? I wanted to ask what it was but I knew better. Besides I wouldn't understand anyway.

"Puppy?"

"You talk too fast." I dismissed. "I don't listen well."

Rewind. "Now with 15% more per bottle with prices lower than our leading competitors."

Bailey touched my hand. "What he said wasn't true Puppy. You're not stupid."

My eyes shut. Tears filled them and I hated it. I didn't want Bailey to see me cry. I didn't want him to know how badly I hurt inside. I wanted to look like I didn't care.

"I don't care what you think."

"You don't mean that Puppy." He frowned.

I thought hard about what to say. I didn't want to hurt my friend's feelings but he deserved a friend much smarter than me. Someone who knew what fabric softener was. "Yes I do. Go away."

Bailey did go away, closing the door loudly behind him. I opened my eyes and tears began to pour out. I buried my face in Milo. Cheddar Cheese mewed at me.

I rewound the show.

"Cos everyone likes to Cuddle." I whispered into Milo's fur.

I wished there was a longer show on. Like the Shark. Maybe that was on a different channel? I pressed the up button. It was easy to see because it had arrows. I pressed it and pressed it.

No Shark lady.

And I couldn't find my show again.

I got up, turning the TV off. I crawled into my bed and buried my face into the pillow as the door opened. "Puppy? It's time for you to come out now."

It was Scott.

"No."

"Puppy I know you're upset but if you disobey me, I will punish you."

"Don't care."

The bed sunk down beside me and a hand rested on my back. "You upset Bailey."

I closed my eyes. I didn't want to upset him. "He should get a better friend."

"You're a good friend Puppy."

"No. I can't think on my own." My voice wavered and I clenched my eyes shut. "I don't...make my words fast enough and I forget the words I'm supposed to use. Bailey can--he does it really fast, faster than even you maybe."

"That's not true."

I lifted my head. "It is true. I can't think like everyone else. Why would anyone want to be with me? Connor's right."

"Connor was drunk Puppy. People say terrible things they don't mean when they drink."

His words didn't make sense. I didn't even try to think about them. I just buried my face under the pillow and stopped trying.

His words were just noise. Background noise with no meeting. Scott lifted my body up. He looked at me and a sad look came into his eyes.

"I can't stand to see you like this."

He waited, looking at me. I formed my words in my head. "I'm sorry I'm such a bad boy."

He kissed my mouth. Surprised I found my hands on his chest, leaning into it. Scott pulled back, breathing heavily as he rested his forehead against mine. "You're my good, beautiful, smart boy. And I love you so much I can't even explain it."

Tears stung my eyes. "I-I don't deserve it. I need to be better. But I can't get better."

Scott shook his head. "You can. The more you practice the easier it will get."

"I'll always be Connor's stupid little Puppy."

"No you won't. You're only that until you decide to be someone else."

"Someone else?"

"Someone with ambition as big as the sky and the self confidence to try new things--who were becoming."

"I was becoming someone...else?"

Scott smiled. "You rode a horse Puppy even though it was hard and you fell off. You tried new foods willingly even though you said you never would. You made me sandwiches because we wanted to be helpful--did you ever do any of those things with Connor?"

I thought about it for an awfully long time. "Connor didn't want my help."

"Connor didn't care enough to push you to be the best you can. You're not that person anymore. You're not the Puppy who sleeps in a dog kennel and eats like an animal on the floor. You're turning into someone...incredible. Someone that I fall in love with every day."

I toyed with my fingers. "Even though I think and listen slow?"

"That doesn't matter to me at all. I love you the way you are.

A/N 2.0: The FEELS! I can't! I just ship it so much...

Bad/good news. I'm starting my new job so updates won't be as frequent. I'll still try to update just as much as possible though! At least every other day, I swear. ☺️

QOTC: What'd ya think?