Shifted #Wattys2016

LXVI

Jac: That Morning

I shoved everything of mine I could into the duffle, and when that was full I started to shove things into my backpack. My wallet, favorite photos, clothing, laptop and phone and chargers, shoes, favorite books, important papers, anything I saw that I thought I needed.

Greyson was yelling at me through the door. He was high, but coming down fast, and lashing out at anyone he could.

"It's funny that you think that you can just leave! I own you! I fucking own you!"

I wiped the tears off of my face and tried to focus on packing. Where would I go? There's one place I can think of, but I can't be certain they'd let me in.

I grabbed my backpack and duffle and looked around the room one last time. I wouldn't be able to get anything back later.

I remembered the empty book I kept my stash of cash in and grabbed it. I unlocked my door and opened it. I ducked under Greyson's arm and fled to the door. He was still screaming at me, about how I was a fucking slut and a whore and I belonged on the streets and that no one would love me or take care of me and that I was pathetic and useless and that he didn't think my parents had been forced to give me up and that they just didn't fucking want me.

I started to run as soon as I hit the street, my ratty Converse smacking the pavement as I ran to Felix's home. My vison was blurred with tears and my head hurt from crying and I just wanted to lay down and die.

Because maybe Greyson was right and I was a fucking slut because he fucking raped me and I didn't tell anyone and I didn't fight back and I was so happy when Ronnie showed up because maybe, finally, he wouldn't turn to me. Maybe Greyson was right that I would never be loved, and that no one would take care of me. Who wants something that's broken to fix? That's what I am. Broken.

Maybe my parents saw that when I was young.

And they backed out before it was too late.

Before I knew it, I had wound up in front of Felix's house.

I knocked on the front door, hoping to the God I no longer believed in that someone would answer.

And someone did.

I wasn't for sure, but I guessed that this was Emmett. He looked to be about the right age.

"Uhm, hi, Emmett right?" I was out of breath, and although it felt like I had already lost it, it felt like I was just about to lose it again.

He nodded. "And you are?"

I looked over his shoulder and my eyes locked with Felix's. The grey in his eyes was so much softer than Greyson's. It was a relief for someone to finally look at me and care.

"Jac?"

"You two know each other?"

I stepped inside and set my bags down. I wrapped my hands around Felix and started to cry again. "Please, Felix, I need help. Please help me."

Is this my home?