Diary Of A Hermit: Intimacy With GOD

Day 3 Wild Dreams

23 Jun 2016 6:08:25 AM
Woke up very early with a little bit of headache. It was around 3:50 am. I had mixtures of dreams. One was quick, with Manang Lydia Ongcoy, who appeared to me and we made a greeting of kiss like my mother. I wondered why she came when she died last year. She was very much alive in my dream. I woke up but went back to sleep again.

Then I had another dream. This time, they were just voices, but I was very sure I was awaken by the songs. It was like a dream but I was half awake. Only that my eyes were so heavy. I heard a group of people singing for me outside the house. I didn't see them, but they were singing a happy song. But it was still past 3am, and I asked why so early. I wanted to get up but my body and eyes were heavy. I thought I was having nightmares, but they were singing!

When I got back to my senses, the first reaction was right away to look around, but it was so dark. Then I started questioning and feeling strange. Are there strangers living around this forest Sanctum? It is possible because there are so many big trees in here. But they must be very friendly.

The place is very much organic, no tress being cut, the leaves are left to fertilize the soil. So trees are growing big, bushes are everywhere and thick woods not disturbed. Sometimes, when I walk around, I feel really strange things, but I don't allow it to manipulate my mind. I continue moving, but also respecting the silence around me.

11:19:10 AM
I spent the whole morning alone in my cell. I really had nothing to do, it was difficult for me to pray and I was not that stable. I took my brush and forced myself to love it. I started sketching, but it was so very ugly. I made another one and another, spoiling my illustration boards. Anyway, in the end, I guess I made a nice one, a bit presentable and colorful.

I am in the chapel as of this writing, making my period of prayers. It is so quiet, and I could only hear the birds. I am feasted by mosquitos all over, and now, I have a lot of marks in my arms and feet. I saw Bro. El very friendly to mosquitos, he just chase them away. Sr. Angie uses the electric fan for mosquitos. They are brothers and sisters, part of the creation. This is just my thinking. Instead me, I am so cruel to them, I immediately kill them. I don't have the patience and tolerance for these parasites. I should practice it.

23 Jun 2016 3:36:46 PM
I had a nice siesta, still I slept on the floor. It was a bit comfortable by now compared yesterday . I participate in the many suffering street children who don't have any comfort of sleeping, and the many people in Africa who are just sleeping on the floor.

The reflexologist arrived and I had my head, arms, neck and backed massaged. I was not really contented, I was expecting a hard massage to remove my body pains. I was also expecting a full body massage as I am feeling the pain all over. Next time, I will look for a real traditional "hilot."

I never realized that since Monday, those were the first group of people who came to visit. But I admire Sr. Angie, she remained calm and silent while doing her work, wrapping the soap with plastic. She has really embraced complete silence, without being attached to people. She knows her limits.

9:00pm
I helped in wrapping the soaps after dinner. We are trying to meet the deadline on the 28th of June. They were watching tv while I watched just in a glance, maintaining my silence. We were a silent actually, less talk while working and watching.

I went to my hut after. I was feeling strange inside but I did not entertain it. I can feel sometimes and hear sometimes strange phenomenon but I never entertain them. I just prepared my bed, and silently went into my bed.