23 Jun 2016 6:22:03 AM
Lord help me to discover your will in me!
Slowly slowly, I am embracing my own self once again. I feel that I am entering into the system of quiet life and focusing into myself, my hobby, my life, my prayer and my spirit. Silence is leading me somewhere. I just don't know yet where and how will I follow. I still have a long way to go.
Now that I am alone, I am confronting my own boredom, my impatience, my being unmindful to many little things. As I enter into my work, I feel I am not missing anybody or anyone. I am not missing my work either. I am just contended of being here, even though my future is unknown.
I feel like floating, very uncertain of my life, what would happen to me tomorrow. But deep inside me, I know that this is what I am longing. God, show me the way!
A little solitude relaxes the mind, I hope that after this month of solitude, I will feel invigorated. So, it means that we really have to place ourselves into a new environment without the comforts of Facebook, Google, phones and friends and connections.
Of course silence and solitude could be uncomfortable, but it is necessary to be incorporated in our daily lives. I am happy here even with the most difficult mosquitoes to deal with, with the uncomfortable lifestyle. I am accepting this choice as a privileged gift, to be alone and pray and relax and to go back home, to my inner self.
I am still having the same body clock, get up at 4:00am, bath and wash my clothes, go to the chapel, rosary and lauds, breakfast, then personal silence. I pray, I draw, I clean the house, i paint, write or walk around. By 11:00 personal silence, breviary and lunch, then siesta. When I get up, clean outside, help the Hermitines, silence, prayer and mass. Dinner after, then help in wrapping the soap, then rest.
I have established a very simple routine, and it is helping me to be grounded in this time of solitude. For so many time here, I am just alone, but not lonely.
My search for solitude is not an indication of unhappiness, as others thought of it. I just want silence, I just need space and time, I just need rest- all in line of having intimacy with the Lord. I know that my superiors don't understand this, but now, I am having real conversation with people, the broken lives of the Hermitines, conversation with myself in prayer and more time having conversation with God.
YOU ARE READING
Diary Of A Hermit: Intimacy With GOD
SpiritualThis will be a compilation of my daily journal as I entered into a month of solitude as a guest Hermitine at D'Sanctum. I am so grateful for this experience, it was an intense period of solitude, rest and prayer. God is really so good!
