11 Jul 2016 5:01:14 AM
After my very long talk with Fr. Gene last night, a few thoughts came clearly in my reflection. He told me to right down thoughts that surfaced in this period of prayers and offer them to the Lord and to my Superior.
1. I can settle it out with my congregation, not to leave but to ask for an assignment where I can continue to live in solitude. Example, if the novitiate can be reopened, I can stay there, not necessarily as novice master, but a part of the community, can engage in some retreats or recollection from outside once in a while, study, prepare notes and stay quiet.
I feel so tired with administration, especially dealing of money. Since I was young, I was already into small business as our family survived in this way. I worked in the bank with the same nature. I was the Bursar in my community in London, in Africa and now in Asia. I want to be relieved from this, especially now with the demands of WMP Administration and the demands of the community and ministry. I have long realized that I was not praying very well anymore, that life has become so busy and little by little consumed all my energy and my spirit.
2. To take the offer of the Father General that I should do the Comboni Year, to energize myself, rest from long years in mission and administration, regain energy and strengthen identification and go back to the mission. In the mission, I lived a very tiring and demanding life plus the sickness. But I always had time for myself and for prayer and silence. At the end of the day, I was alone in the field, seated around the fire and pray, or pray with the local people. Back in the in house, I settle down quietly in the chapel after heavy day and then rest.
3. Compassion to my congregation. When I spoke with the Father General, I know that he understood very well my personal journey, and he was also emphasizing the importance of our spiritual life. He was happy that my issues are like this, which is a healthy spirit. He encouraged me to take the Comboni year for a rest and regain energy. My decision to stay is of my compassion, that is a positive way of offering my life and even setting aside my personal dreams for my congregation.
YOU ARE READING
Diary Of A Hermit: Intimacy With GOD
SpiritualThis will be a compilation of my daily journal as I entered into a month of solitude as a guest Hermitine at D'Sanctum. I am so grateful for this experience, it was an intense period of solitude, rest and prayer. God is really so good!
