Finally Falling

16: We're still going

I was still in the warm embrace of Brandon's hug. He had his hand in my hair and was gently stroking it. He was mumbling words that I couldn't make out. Jesse and Steph looked relieved. Steph was calming her rapid sobs. I don't think I've had anyone cry over me. I don't think I've ever had a real friend. The next thing happened so quick I didn't even realise it until I was being questioned.

"What happened, are you okay? Kate talk to me! I need you to talk to me. Are you okay?" It was Jace. His voice was filled with concern and panic. I didn't know how much he knew, but I think that the person Jesse was talking to in the car was Jace. Instead of replying with words, I just hugged him. I didn't feel like talking. I still couldn't talk. I was scared. Very scared. Scared that I would never see these people again. Scared of everything. Actually, I was petrified. Jace hugged me back, his brotherly concern showing greatly. I was still crying and I was still paralysed in fear.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Cass go over to Steph and heard Steph telling her everything. As soon as Steph finished, Cassie's eyes were buckets of tears. They were streaming down her face wildly. Tobias was trying to calm her down and Jesse and Caleb were conversing about how everyone needed to stay calm and that it was the scariest thing that Jesse had ever encountered. Both Jesse and Caleb and Steph and Cass talked about their fear of losing me. They thought I couldn't hear them, but it was dead quiet and I could make out every single word. They all talked about how they loved me. I was surprised. Genuinely surprised. No one has ever talked about me in such a loving and caring way. They were all now hell-bent on protecting me and they were all discussing plans on how someone should be with me at all times.

All of them except Brandon. Brandon was just standing alone and looking down. He looked miserable and broken. He didn't let it show, but I could just tell. After about five whole minutes of being embraced in Jace's warm hug, I moved away. I looked like a wreck. I could see my reflection in one of the rear view mirrors. My eyes were red and puffy, showing that I had been crying and my cheeks were saturated with glistening tears.

As soon as Jace let go of me, I was attacked by another hug from Steph. She finally pulled away and grabbed my shoulders. "Please d-don't ever d-d that a-aga-again!" she said through wild sobs. I just nodded and was soon embraced in a hug by Cass. "Yeah, don't y-you d-dare do that again!" I just nodded and returned the hug.

After being hugged and told off by everyone, I had finally found my voice. It cracked and wavered at my points, but I was happy that I was still capable of talking. They discussed that we wouldn't go to the beach today after the frightening incident that just happened, but I immediately objected. I said I was sorry. Awfully sorry and that I didn't want to ruin their day. They just scolded me for saying that as it was not my fault that a panic attack took place.

Surfing and swimming were possibly the only two things that could cheer me up at this point and I desperately needed cheering up. They were all reluctant about the idea, especially Jace. Brandon just stayed quiet. He didn't say a word. He just kept looking down in deep concentration.

After persuading everyone into going we all headed back into our cars. Cassie and Jace wanted to come with us to make sure that I was going to be alright but I told them not to worry and that I was going to be fine. Everybody in Caleb's car was off. I asked Steph and Jesse to give me and Brandon some privacy for two minutes and they obeyed. I grabbed Brandon and dragged him to a spot where neither Jesse nor Steph could hear us.

"Brandon," I said with a gentle but cracking voice, he was still looking down.

"What happened?" he asked, his head snapping up in an instant.

"I-I had a panic attack."

"Why?"

"I don't know. I'm sorry, I really am." Instead of replying he just looked down. His expression stoic and impassive again.

"Brandon, thank you, thank you for trying to help." Before he could say or do anything, I slammed my body onto his and I was hugging him. He hugged me back, holding me tight. Holding me protectively. I had a feeling that we had suddenly grown closer, but that didn't mean I wasn't going to prank him. He might be caring today, but we all now that he's an asshole at other times.

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