Finally Falling

24: I can't lose the people I care for

I couldn't tell him. My own two brothers didn't know what had happened. How could I trust Brandon? How could I trust someone who claims to hate my guts? I couldn't tell Brandon. What assurance did I have that he wouldn't go around blabbering it all out? But he trusted me with his own past. He trusted me with the past that left him vulnerable and broken. Why did he trust me?

"Kate, I just poured my soul out to you, it's your turn. There's no going back now. You have to let your feelings out. You can't bottle them up. Honestly, it feels kind of good to lift the weight off." He said it. He said the words I needed to reassure me. But I couldn't just pour out my entire soul to him. My own two blood brothers didn't know. I couldn't tell Brandon. It would just put him in danger. It would activate fear inside of him. He wouldn't be able to not know it after I told him. Ignorance is bliss. In some cases, so is oblivion. He wouldn't have to lie about anything if he didn't know anything in the first place. I can't risk his life by telling him. I already did that once to the people I cared about.I'm not going to do it again.

I simply told him that I missed my parents. That's what the rest of the world knew anyway. They only knew that my parents were no longer here. They didn't know why or what caused their death. Brandon didn't need to know this either. I told him what the everyone else knew but he didn't buy it. He was getting pissed at me. He kept going on about how he had told me his story and it was my turn. I couldn't back out.

"I can't tell you."

"Why the fuck not?"

"Because if you don't know anything you'll be safe."

"I don't give a shit about that. You need to tell me what's bothering you. If you're not telling me because you're concerned about my safety then this shit must be serious. You need to tell me so I can help keep you safe."

I kept arguing with him about it but he kept finding ways to win the arguments. I was about to leave but he blocked the door and forced me to sit down. I didn't want anything happening to Brandon or anyone else I cared about. Yes, I absolutely hate to admit it but I do care about Brandon. After the game on Monday, we had a chat. A chat in which he actually joked with me. We moved to a tolerance level to a possible friendship level. But a friendly level didn't mean I would go and tell him all my secrets. But Brandon had a skill in manipulation. He used that to his advantage and eventually I had to give in.

"It was Wednesday. It was the day when Justin would go out to the local sports club and teach Jace football skills. It was the one night where it was just my parents and me. My parents were concerned about me. I had got some messages from a random dude. He wanted to meet me. I was a kid so I was stupid enough to reply. He sent me inappropriate things. He wanted to know all about my parents and their business. He wanted to find out everything about my family. He threatened me. He said that he would kill the people I loved if I told anyone about it. I told my parents about it. My parents told the police and that's when the man got angry. On Wednesday night at exactly 8:31 pm he sent 4 men. The men were heavily armed. One of them held me back and forced me to watch them torture my parents." I remember every single detail that night. Every single one. It wasn't something that you could just forget. No. It was something that would leave you scarred for the rest of your life.

"I don't want to go into the details of that night." Brandon shook his head in understanding. He didn't push me to say anything but I pushed myself. I didn't want to tell him the whole truth, but if I told him half of it I had to tell him the rest of it as well otherwise I wouldn't be able to get the heavy burden of my chest.

"The men were all laughing and were too distracted to notice that I had called the police from my mum's phone that had somehow ended up in my pocket that night. It hadn't even been 2 minutes and the police barged in. The men ran. But they managed to finish their job to kill the people that I loved. I saw them die. I saw the cops calling Justin and I saw Justin rush through the door with a panicked and scared expression on his face. They took the bodies away. They called uncle Ricky and when he came he arranged the funeral." Tears were dripping from my eyes faster than the speed of light and they were blurring my vision.

"Jace and Justin don't know about this and I plan to keep it that way. The man didn't joke around. He threatened me and it was a legitimate threat. Jace and Justin are the only people I have left. I am not losing them. I want you to keep your mouth shut about this. You can't tell anyone about this. Do you understand me? I can't and I won't lose the people that I love and that includes you."

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