Yours. » miniminter ff

CHAPTER E I G H T

you know that I won't stop until I make you mine

M I N E

Originally when I thought about it, I decided to just push aside what happened that night with Simon but something kept nagging at me. Maybe it was the way he sounded or the fact he thought to call me while drunk, but it bothered me that he never got to say what he wanted to.

I had the perfect opportunity when JJ told me I had left something at their place. I went alone, telling Imani that I was running errands. I didn't tell her about the phone call.

I didn't want her or Freya adding their opinions to the mix when I didn't get to hear from Simon himself what was going on.

Maybe it was some small little thing, maybe he accidentally pressed my contact or something. Either way the curiosity was eating at me and I needed to find out what he wanted to say.

I ended up at Simon and JJ's place late Sunday afternoon. The sun was shining, very nice for London. I stopped in my tracks when I got to their door, still figuring out what I was going to say to him in the first place. I hadn't thought much about it, just bringing it up casually in the hopes that he would sort of finish the conversation for me.

"Hey!" Simon said when he answered the door. I looked at him and smiled, walking inside and looking around for JJ. "He went to go get food but he said this is your phone charger." Simon said handing it to me. "Yeah thanks." I replied slowly, clearing my throat. "Can I ask you about last night?" I questioned, watching his facial expression.

"What about last night?" He asked confused.

I stared at him for a moment before a small frown was placed on my lips. "You don't remember?" I asked him curiously. Simon put his face in his hands and groaned. "Did I do something?" He asked moving his hands away. "No, Tobi just told me you wanted to talk to me." I made up quickly.

It was quiet between us and I felt myself feeling slightly disappointed.

Not like it mattered, I should've known he wouldn't remember.

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The last video Imani and I did with the Sidemen did so well that they decided to bring us back after comments suggested new video ideas. We had made it to the filming set on time, bringing coffee for everyone since it was a bit early.

After having to wait twenty more minutes for Josh, we finally got started.

This week was giving the Sidemen makeovers. I had this idea when we first got into London so the ability to make that idea a reality was really nice.

It was nice spending time with everyone especially since we had all been busy. Simon was acting a bit weirder than usual, and by weird more like mean in a way. He was always kind of judgmental but it felt different today, like someone ruined his entire mood.

I tried my best to keep the energy lighthearted, I didn't want the video turning out crappy because of someone's bad attitude. Thankfully we finished the video smoothly, the boys ended up looking really nice too.

I went to approach Simon quickly when our eyes met and he hurried off. My face fell as I watched him talk with some of the crew before Tobi came up to me. "You okay, Lil?" He asked me soothingly. "Yeah, I'm okay." I lied.

Maybe it was my imagination but it just felt like Simon was ignoring me. Even throughout filming, he had Imani make him over instead of me. Any other time he would have jumped to get a chance to be on my team.

I found myself frowning and it wasn't hard to tell something bothered me. "Are you sure?" Tobi asked. "What's up with him today?" I asked, motioning towards where Simon was standing. "Simon? I don't know, he's been like this since yesterday." Tobi explained. "Yesterday?" I questioned, turning my attention to Tobi. "Yeah, we had a small get together at my place. I invited some of the rest of the gang and he's just been like that since he left."

I took a moment to process Tobi's words. "I wouldn't worry too much about it, sometimes he's just like that." Tobi said with a pat on my shoulder. I forced a small smile as I started to help with cleaning up.

It wasn't until I was in the shower when it dawned on me.

Did Simon like me?

It was a fleeting thought. I pushed it away as quickly as it came mostly just because it was ridiculous. We were friends, always had been and it wasn't going to change. There was no way that guy could like me, not at all.

But what if he did?

I wanted to talk to Imani about it or maybe even Freya but how would I talk about something like that without bringing my own personal feelings into it? Did I think Simon was attractive? Yes. Did I have fun with him? Of course. Did I like him? I don't know.

The thought of having feelings for anyone right now was too much stress on my brain, I didn't want to even consider dating anyone right now maybe ever. There was a reason none of my other relationships worked out, and the common denominator was me.

I came to terms with that months ago, I couldn't just move backwards and get feelings for the first guy who showed me some attention.

I couldn't do that to myself and I wouldn't.

I went back and forth about it so much that it was almost midnight when I thought about bringing it to my sisters attention but I knew she'd be asleep. I took that as a sign that this would just have to wait for another day.

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this chapter was rewritten on august 10th, 2021

song of the chapter: make you mine by public