Yours. » miniminter ff

Thirty Six

Little do you know
How I'm breaking while you fall asleep
Little do you know
I'm still haunted by the memory
Little do you know
I'm trying to pick myself up piece by piece
Little do you know
I need a little more time
Underneath it all I'm held captive by the hole inside
I've been holding back
For the fear that you might change your mind
I'm ready to forgive you but forgetting is a harder fight
Little do you know
I need a little more time

I woke up with a pounding headache, making my eyes water a bit as I rubbed my eyes. I had been crying so much last night my eyes were bright red and puffy. I looked over at Jack who had an arm draped around my waist, a small gap between us. I smiled softly and kissed his cheek, his eyes fluttered open and he smiled. "Hey." I said to him in a whisper. "Good morning." He said with a smile and I threw the covers off my bed. Jack had refused to leave me after last night, and although I didn't tell him exactly what happened, he understood it was enough to make me upset, that was all that mattered at that point. However I knew he'd ask at some point and I wasn't ready to admit to him that I still had feelings for Simon, especially when I shouldn't.

"Breakfast?" He asked as he kissed my forehead. I nodded and watched him put on his clothes, walking out the room and shutting the door. I sighed and checked my phone, seeing a few missed calls from Cal. "Hey, you called?" I raised an eyebrow as I pulled my hair up into a bun. "Just wanted to make sure you're okay. Tobi told me what happened." I breathed out a sigh and sat back on my bed. "I'm fine." I said with a clenched jaw. "I need to tell you someth-" There was a pause and some shuffling, then I heard Tobi in the background with some comments from Josh. "Hey Lily! Cal will talk to you later. He stubbed his toe." I couldn't even answer due to Tobi hanging up. I shrugged it off and went out into the kitchen where Jack, Mani, and Chris were talking. "I'm making pancakes." Jack said as Mani handed him a cup of chocolate chips. "Great." I said with a small smile.

"You okay?" Mani asked as she put her head on my shoulder. "I will be."

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I walked into the store with a determined look on my face, with Mani at home with Chris filming a video, it was my duty to go grocery shopping. I wish I had some help but Jack had something to do with Conor and couldn't do anything to get out of it. I walked up and down the aisles in search for the items on the list. That's when I saw her. Long blonde hair, wearing jeans and a sweater and some knee high boots. If she wasn't tall already, she was even taller now. I was about to approach her when I saw a guy who wasn't Simon, he was tall too, a red head with glasses. He kissed her cheek and they looked at each other with so much love. If she was in love with this guy then why was she with Simon?

I ducked behind a corner and continued on my quest, taking in a deep breath and deciding what to do with this information. I could tell him but after last time I would rather not. I could possibly tell one of the boys and see if they'd believe me, my best bet would be Tobi. But even then, Simon might get upset with Tobi and I would hate for them to fight about something like this. Do I just not tell him? Keep it to myself and let him fend for himself? My mind was thinking of how great an idea was that but my heart was telling me that I was making a big mistake. I rolled my eyes and grabbed a box of cereal and threw it in the cart. "Fuck." I whispered to myself as I headed to check out.

I drove to the apartment but not before calling Cal and inviting him over. "Mani?" I called out, her door was wide open and when I didn't see them I figured they went out. I waited for Cal and when the door flew open, I looked over at him. He looked a bit tired and a bit annoyed but I didn't want to bother him. "Hey, you wanted to talk?" He questioned. After sitting on my couch, I pulled a blanket over me and glanced at him. "Alexa is cheating on Simon." He looked at me for a moment in confusion. "Now before you tell me that I need proof or whatever, I do. Last night at Joe's party, she was talking to another guy and telling him how she missed him and his cuddles. Then today I went to get some groceries and I saw her with this redhead and they looked very much in a relationship."

"Why are you telling me? Shouldn't you be mentioning this to Simon?" He raised an eyebrow, seemingly calm about this situation. "I tried, he didn't believe me." I admitted. "You don't believe me do you?" I asked him, he let out a sigh before opening his mouth to reply. "It's not that, it's just, why do you care? He treats you like shit and you're over here worrying about his girlfriend? You have Jack, worry about him." I looked away from him and I could feel myself growing more tired by the minute. "I can't explain it okay? I just do. I'm an idiot to care about him the way I do but I do, I want him to be happy." I glanced back over at Cal who had his hands connected, he was sitting with his elbows on his knees. "I'll talk to him I guess." I smiled and hugged him tightly. "I love you, Cal." I said to him which made him chuckle. "I love you too, Lil."

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Another chapter up! It's kind of a filler chapter because the next few are going to be intense.

It's been a long day, long story short I had my birthday party today, my birthday was actually yesterday but because everyone was busy I celebrated my 18th today.

I'm legal and I feel so excited.

Song of the chapter: Little Do You Know by Alex & Sierra