Yours. » miniminter ff

Thirty Four

I never needed you like I do right now
I never needed you like I do right now
I never hated you like I do right now
Cause all you ever do is make me

"You are so beautiful." I stared at Jack across the table and blushed. "Thanks." I mumbled before taking a sip of my water. "I want to ask this but I'm scared you'll get angry at me." He finally said, he didn't have to continue for me to know that it was about Simon. "It just didn't work out. We didn't mesh." I said quickly before clearing my throat. This had been Jack and I's fifth date. I was really starting to like him and it was scary for me. After everything with Simon, I was scared that maybe I wouldn't be able to be with anyone again but Jack seemed to be breaking down those walls. "Okay." Was all he said about that topic. "Did you get the message about the secret Santa that Joe is hosting?" I looked at him for a moment and laughed. "Secret Santa? No, I didn't hear about it. Is that what we're doing this year?"

He nodded and continued to eat his burger. "I don't like the whole thing but I guess he wants us all at his house tomorrow." He rolled his eyes and I giggled, leaning on my elbows. "It'll be fun, don't worry about it." We finished dinner and he dropped me off at home, I walked inside the apartment and saw Mani on the couch with Chris by her side. "Hey guys." I announced and they pulled away from each other fast. "So, how was the date?" Mani grinned at me and I laughed. "Great, as usual." I said while I retreated into my bedroom. I went to grab my laptop to start editing when my phone rang.

"Lily?" I recognized the voice on the other end and smiled. "Hey Joe! Hey, sorry I just heard about your secret Santa thing."

"No worries, I actually wanted to talk to you about that." I frowned a bit before sitting down on the edge of my bed. "Okay, what's up?" I could hear him shuffling and then there was a pause. "I just wanted to let you know that I've invited the Sidemen to join us this year. So there's a chance you might get matched with Simon." I let it sink in and scoffed a bit after thinking about it. "Don't worry about it Joe, what are the odds?"

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I walked into Joe's house with Jack holding my hand, he kissed my cheek and I smiled, we were pretty late and everyone else was waiting on us to arrive. I walked into his living room where everyone was crowded around. "Hey guys!" Jack announced and all eyes were on us. "What the hell?" JJ looked between us and then shook his head. "You two are dating?" Most of the room seemed to be in disbelief about us. "Yeah." I said slowly before stepping closer to Jack. "Congrats." Tobi said as he came over and gave me a quick hug. "Ignore him." He whispered to me and I looked at him confused before it clicked. I glanced over at Simon who was staring at me, his arm wrapped tightly around Alexa. His jaw was clenched and his eyebrows furrowed. I knew he hated me but I thought he would have gotten a least a little bit passed it. I hated seeing him so angry at me.

But Mani was right. It was my fault. I deserved him being angry at me.

"Alright, well now that everyone is here, you will pick a name out of the hat and that will be the person you have to get a gift for. There isn't a limit, you can also make the gift but it does have to come from the heart." Joe said with a laugh. "I hope I get Conor, I know exactly what to get him." Jack said but I didn't reply, mostly because I was looking at the faces of people who were drawing names from a Santa hat. "Here ya go, Lil!" Joe smiled at me and held out the Santa hat. I smiled and hesitantly stuck my hand inside, pulling out a tiny slip of paper. I waited until Jack was distracted before I looked at my paper.

You've got to be fucking kidding me.

I got Simon.

Simon.

Really? You couldn't have given me Josh or Cal, or hell even Caspar or JJ? Of all the people in this room you choose Simon? The universe must hate me. "Who'd you get?" Jack asked and I shoved the piece of paper into my back pocket. "Not telling. It's a secret." I faked a smile before excusing myself. After spending a few moments in the bathroom cursing myself for being stupid, I walked out, bumping into Alexa. "Hey Lily!" She said to me and I walked out with a small smile. "Hey, how are you?" I asked casually. "I'm doing great! Congrats on the new boyfriend, he's a cute one." She flicked her blonde hair over her shoulder and I watched as her phone screen lit up. "I should take this, nice talking to you."

She turned around and walked down the hallway, I raised an eyebrow and being the nosy person I am, decided to follow her. Eavesdropping is really bad and I normally wouldn't do it but I was curious. "I miss you too babe. I'm almost done at this party and then I'll be coming home." I frowned and peeked around the corner. "You know you're the only thing I want right now. I want your cuddles." I pulled away and crossed my arms. "That sneaky bitch." I whispered. "I love you too." I quickly walked away and into the kitchen where Tobi pulled me aside. "What's wrong? You look like you've seen a ghost."

I shook my head. "Not a ghost but I think I caught a cheater." He looked at me curiously and I chewed on my bottom lip. I could tell him or I could keep it to myself. Why do you even care? I asked myself and I felt myself fighting with what to do. Just because he was angry at me didn't mean I didn't care for Simon any less. "I think I need to talk to him." I said to Tobi. "I don't think that's a good idea." He said to me quietly but I didn't want to hear it. He should know what kind of girlfriend he has. I turned around and looked for Simon, seeing him talking to Lux and Manny. "We need to talk." I said to him, not giving him any chance to respond, I pulled him by the arm and led him out by the front door. "What the fuck? Don't touch me." He said and I could feel my heart tug. "What do you want?" I took a deep breath and looked over my shoulder before turning to him. "I think your girlfriend is cheating on you."

His facial expression turned angry and I could see the darkness in his eyes. "And where are you getting this information from? Look I don't care if you still want to be with me, but last time I checked you missed that chance a long ass time ago." I crossed my arms, I felt like I was defending myself not only emotionally but physically. "This isn't to get you back Simon. In case you haven't noticed, I have a boyfriend." He scoffed and ran a hand through his hair. "Right. You and Jack. You think he cares about you but he doesn't, he just wants to get into your pants. That's all you'll ever be used for." He brushed passed me and I couldn't even comprehend what just happened.

Before I knew it tears were on the verge of falling and I could feel eyes on me. "Don't. Don't say it." Josh and Tobi stood behind me with pitying faces. "Sorry." Josh said and I shook my head. "I hate him." My heart was in pieces at this point.

I wish I could have said that I hated him and meant it, that I never wanted to see his stupid face again, that he made me sick.

But I love him and I don't know how to stop.

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Ahh the drama

I love drama if you couldn't tell

Anyway here's a new chap!
I have a new story out called Pretty Girls, it's a sidemen fanfic
i really like it and have so many cute ideas for it, check it out for me?

Song of the chapter: Make Me (Cry) by Noah Cyrus