Ask Magnus Chase and Friends

Hunding /Told/ Helgi, Magnus's Hairbrush, and Squeaky Arrows.

Adventures_girl_99 asks: Blitz : smack anyone you meet in Valhalla with the "Make way for ducklings", and Hearth ? buddy! gear up to be cupid ( Decipher that however you want and don't forget the squeaky arrows)

Blitzen: *sighs* All right, then, let's do this.

Hearth: *raises an eyebrow* You sure? I don't think it's a good idea..

Blitzen: C'mon, buddy, it'll be fine. Bonus points if you hit Magnus with a squeaky arrow.

Hearth: Fine. But if someone complains, I'm not being held responsible.

*an hour later, both the dwarf and elf are ready to (very bad-ass) shoot squeaky arrows into scary people's butts, while hitting them with a make way for ducklings sign*

Blitzen: Okay. First person we see: that guy over there. *approaches him with the sign in hand*

Hearth: Hunding? *shrugs and shoots the arrow*

Hunding: Godsdammit—that was the fourth time today! *turns around* But that means you guys got luggage—finally!

Blitzen: Uh, we're visitors looking to cause potential trouble here at Hotel Valhalla?

Hunding: *raises an eyebrow* Aren't you guys Blitzen and Hearthstone? Guests of Odin? C'mon in. Your friend's on the nineteenth floor.

Hearth: *thanks Hunding with a nod and turns away*

Hunding: Wait—just a heads up. Watch out for the big men with the axes. They're practicing their spear-throwing in the living room.

Blitzen: Practicing spear-throwing in the living room, with axes?

Hunding: *shrugs and turns back to his work* They're drunk too. I told Helgi not to spike any of their drinks. But no, it was for 'Fun Friday'—drunk einherjar are so hard to clean up after, I swear.

Blitz: I'm scared. You?

Hearth: Terrified. Let's do the nineteenth floor, only. For the sake of our lives.

*nineteen floors later*

Hearth: *shoots an arrow at Mallory*

Mallory: *hits her breasts*

Mallory: ...*eyes glint angrily* You think you're funny you little pervert, eh? Well, see if this is funny! *throws a dagger at Hearth*

Blitzen: *waves sign at her frantically* No, no, no, no hitting my living boyfriend!

*Magnus's door creaks open*

Magnus: I'm back, Mallory, here's my brush, it helps with tangles. I don't know if it would wor—*pauses as he sees the chaotic scene*

Magnus: On the other hand, I'll give it to you afterwards...just, please don't kill my surrogate parents.
*retreats back inside his room and closes the door*

Hearth, Blitzen, and Mallory: ...

Blitzen: *breaks out into laughter* Magnus lends his 'special' hairbrush to you?

Hearth: *still in shock that Magnus now combs his hair*

Mallory: Oh, shut it, you two.